


Relinquish

by DawnStoneSlifer



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Depression, Eventual Smut?, F/M, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Lots of Angst, Possessive Sans, Protective Sans, Reader Insert, Reader Is Not Frisk, Set Before Frisk Falls, Soulmates, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, alternative title: sans fucks up a lot and you cry, reader is female, slow-burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-03
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-07-11 23:55:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 33,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7075918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DawnStoneSlifer/pseuds/DawnStoneSlifer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You’d climbed Mt. Ebott thinking that you’d never be seen again. </p><p>So when you came face to face with the monsters of the Underground, it was safe to say you were more than a little surprised. </p><p>In fact, you don’t know what’s more surprising; the psychopathic buttercup, the towering motherly goat-lady, or the small chubby skeleton who’s only goal it seems is to make you smile.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. THE ONE WHERE YOU REALISE YOU'RE INSANE

**Author's Note:**

> Well this is a thing. That I wrote. And kept writing. Until suddenly I was like five chapters in and had lost control of everything.
> 
> This was originally meant to be a venting piece for me, cus, y'know; life sucks and all, but it slowly spiralled into this multi-chapter fic that actually has a somewhat decent plot. Wow. 
> 
> I'm gonna TRY and keep updates consistent; I'll try my hardest to post weekly, on a Friday. If, for whatever reason, that isn't possible, I'll be sure to let you know the previous chapter. 
> 
> Also: this fic is gonna cover dark stuff. Suicide, depression and acts of self-harm and destructive behaviour will be mentioned and implied quite frequently within the story, so if you think this will be triggering for you, then I advise you not to read. 
> 
> Keep yourselves happy, guys. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

It wasn’t like you were _trying_ to die, or anything. 

But it wasn’t exactly like you were trying to live, either. 

You simply didn’t care. 

 

The world certainly hadn’t been kind to you, especially in the last 6 months. Kicked out of your house by your parents, forced to live on your best friend’s couch, and to top it all off, you’d just lost your job. What little rent you paid them had come to an abrupt stop, and you knew it was only a matter of time before they abandoned you as well. 

Just like everybody else had. 

You weren’t gonna lie; you’d thought about killing yourself plenty of times before. But something always stopped you. That lingering thought in the back of your head, telling you how selfish the idea was, how your death would hurt so many other people, maybe. 

Well, whatever it was, it was a pain in the ass. 

So, instead of outright trying to kill yourself, you simply stopped caring. 

You no longer looked both ways before crossing the street. You didn’t bother putting on your seatbelt when you drove anywhere. You stopped checking the amount of pills you were taking. You always had a packet of cigarettes handy when you got that familiar aching in your chest. 

You were slowly poisoning yourself but you didn’t have the strength to care any more. 

Maybe it was that lack of sense that had made you come to Mt. Ebott. 

After all, the place was famous for it’s many disappearances over the years. Back in high school, people had spread all kinds of rumours about the mountain and what lurked beneath it. 

You weren’t particularly bothered by it. 

You were kind of hoping you could just...disappear. Hike up this creepy-ass mountain and magically stop existing. None of the pain. None of the guilt. Just. Nothing. 

You wondered if the stories about this place were really true, or whether the people who had disappeared on this mountain had just had the unfortunate luck of running into a massive bear or something. 

Well, whatever. 

 

Your hike lasted about an hour before you stopped to catch your breath. This upwards climb was starting to get annoying really quick. 

However, when you heard the faint sound of running water, you couldn’t help but perk yourself up. Maybe a quick splash to the face with some fresh mountain water would do you some good. 

You followed the noise, quickly locating the source of it; it seemed to be a hollowed out cave in the side of the rock, and you wasted no time in going in and looking around. 

The place was dark, even with the massive opening to the little alcove, and the ground felt craggy beneath your feet. You took a step forward, testing the ground before moving to find the stream you could clearly hear. 

That was, until you felt something wrap around your ankle. 

Your first thought was snake, and in a sudden panic you twisted your body, quickly losing your balance and falling backwards. You braced yourself for the pain.

However, when none came, you honestly felt relief. The last thing you wanted was a sore ass when you were hiking. 

That relief lasted about as long as it took you to notice the dragging sensation. 

You opened your mouth and let out a scream as the ground beneath you - had there even been any ground there in the first place? - disappeared, sending you plummeting down into the caverns of Mt. Ebott. 

The fall lasted about three seconds. 

And then it hit. 

A sharp stab of pain all over your body as you hit the ground, then darkness. 

 

You weren’t really sure what had roused you from unconsciousness first; the distant howling of the wind, the ticklish feeling against your nose, or the agony in your right ankle. 

You’d awoken on a bed of bright yellow flowers; their petals soft to the touch and almost comforting. 

It was too bad the flowers hadn’t managed to cushion your fall a little better. 

You were pretty sure, after a quick inspection, that you’d damaged your ankle pretty badly. Maybe you’d landed on it funny when you’d fallen. Well, whatever the case, it was safe to say you weren’t going to be able to walk on it any time soon. 

“...Well this sucks...” 

The first words to come out of your mouth since you’d fallen - hell, since you’d climbed this god-damn mountain - and they were bitter as hell. 

Figures. Life just had a special way of screwing you over, it seemed. 

You slumped back onto the flowers, staring up through the hole you’d fallen down. There was no way, not even in top condition, that you were gonna climb that. 

Then again...

“...This is fine...”

The words left your mouth in a quiet murmur, and you let your arms flop down, sending stray yellow petals flying. 

“Yep...this is...fine...”

You weren’t sure whether it was the pain in your ankle, or your brain finally taking in the direness of your situation and acting accordingly, but you felt hot, thick tears welling in your eyes. Sniffling a little, you brought your arm up to wipe them away, only to pause as you heard the familiar pitter pat from above. 

Rain. It was raining on the surface. 

You let your arm fall once again, letting the tears slide down your face. Something about the rain reminded you of your best friend. They’d always loved the rain. It would piss you off a little when you were walking and they’d always - always, without fail - jump in the puddle closest to you, soaking you. 

You were going to miss that. 

You were going to miss them. 

You wondered if they were going to miss you, too. 

“...Well, howdy!”

The voice, high-pitched and slightly grating, startled you out of your thoughts. You sat up, wincing a little as the blood rushed to your head, before looking around. 

...What the hell?

Were you going insane? You had to be. You’d clearly heard a voice, but there wasn’t even anyone-

“Down here, friend!”

The voice was louder, closer. Your eyes darted down out of instinct, and what greeted you in the mass of yellow flowers was...

A face. It was literally like someone had taken a Sharpie and drawn a cartoon face on one of the flowers. You raised an eyebrow in confusion, reaching down to touch the soft yellow petals.

“Hey, now! You ever heard of personal space?”

You flinched back with a surprised shriek, your eyes locked on the slowly swaying form of the flower that had just spoken to you. 

Okay, scratch that. You were definitely insane. Maybe you’d also fucked up your head when you’d fallen. 

“Oh gee, I didn’t mean to scare ya! I’m Flowey! Flowey the flower! What’s your name?”

The little yellow flower - now christened Flowey - cocked his head...petals? to the side, his eyes watching you with what you guessed was curiosity. 

You scrambled a little with your thoughts, trying to pull together an explanation as to how a flower of all things was talking to you and moving on it’s own, before stuttering out your name pathetically. 

“Oh wow! Well, _____, you look a little lost. I take it you didn’t mean to fall into the Underground?”

The Underground? Just what in the hell was that? Your head was beginning to throb uncomfortably, which further proved your theory that you had, indeed, damaged some part of your brain when you’d fell. 

“Well, lemme help you out! A vulnerable human like yourself needs a little guidance, after all!”

For a moment, there was silence. And then, something tugged against your chest. Not from the outside; no, it felt like the feeling was coming from inside your rib cage, like your organs were trying to escape your body. 

Or, y’know. Something slightly less gross than that. 

A sudden sense of vertigo washed over you, and your head throbbed uncomfortably for a few seconds. Flowey sat in front of you, the smile still present on his face as he watched you. 

Your eyes darted down when you felt something warm against your chest, and you couldn’t stop a gasp from leaving your lips when you saw what appeared to be a cartoon pastel pink heart, floating in front of you. 

Although, it looked like it had seen better days; the middle of it had a large crack in it that travelled down almost right through it, threatening to split it, with other hairline cracks littering it’s pale pink surface. 

“That’s your SOUL! The very culmination of your being!” Flowey’s voice snapped you out of your daze, and you glanced up at him, watching as he eyed the heart with interest. You weren’t gonna lie, it honestly felt a little weird, like you were baring everything to this odd little flower, like you were an open book.

Then again, nothing about this situation screamed normal. 

“Your SOUL starts off weak, but can grow strong if...if...” he seemed to be struggling with his words a little, concentrating on your so-called ‘SOUL’. Feeling more than a little uncomfortable, you reached up to shield the little cracked heart in your palms, suddenly not liking the idea of him seeing it. 

Your body jolted when you felt something thick and cold wrap around your wrist, squeezing tight. 

_“Who said you could take it back, huh? I wasn’t done explaining...”_

The sudden drop in pitch to his voice terrified you, and you began to struggle, attempting to pry the vines - how the hell did a flower that small have such massive fucking vines? - off your wrist. He squeezed harder, and you whimpered pitifully. 

_“Hm...maybe I should just kill you...I don’t think a SOUL like yours is cut out for what I want...you’re too broken...”_

Well, that was certainly throwing salt in the wound, wasn’t it? As if you needed a god-damn demonic buttercup to tell you you were fucked up in the head. 

A sudden chill wrapped around your body as tiny white...pellet things surrounded you, and you tugged at your arm, trying to scramble to your feet and crying out as your right ankle throbbed in agony, sending you to the floor. 

_“...D i e...”_

You slammed your eyes shut, waiting for the pain to envelop you, for death to finally claim you. 

But it never came. 

After a moment of complete silence, you heard Flowey’s startled cry, a large hissing noise, and the sounds of fire. 

Flowey’s vines slid off your body, and your eyes snapped open. Your hands instinctively went for your SOUL, and you grabbed it, holding it tightly to your chest as you inhaled sharply. 

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor, innocent youth...”

You really didn’t want to take your attention away from the little broken heart you cradled in your palms, but the voice demanded your attention. 

Mustering your courage, you lifted your head to meet the gaze of...

A...goat...lady? 

You were positive. You were out of your fucking mind.


	2. THE ONE WHERE YOU LEARN ABOUT 72 USES FOR SNAILS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here's chapter 2 for you guys. Thanks for all the feedback and kudos on the last chapter; I really appreciate it.
> 
> Next week's chapter may very well be delayed; I'm playing it by ear right now, since a lot of personal shit is going down right now, and writing in the mood I'm in is difficult. 
> 
> But I'm gonna try my hardest to get a chapter up for you all next Friday. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

“...Miss. Toriel?”

“Oh, please, young one, Toriel is fine.”

“Oh...okay...then, Toriel?”

“Yes, my child?”

“...You don’t have to carry me, y’know. I’m pretty sure I can stand on my own now, at least.”

It wasn’t like you wanted to be carried by her. No, rather she had simply picked you up in her massive fluffy arms as soon as she’d realised you were injured. 

And if that worried look on her face was anything to go by, you had a feeling she wouldn’t be letting you down any time soon. 

“Nonsense, young one,” Toriel murmured, a soft smile tugging at her lips, (did goats even have lips? Would you be thought of as weird if you Googled that? Could you even get wifi down here?) “as the caretaker of the RUINS, it’s my job to assist the sick and injured. And, with how your leg looks right now, you’re in no condition to be walking on it.”

Well, you couldn’t argue with that logic. Accepting your fate, you allowed her to continue to carry you through the ruins.

Toriel was nice, you decided. A little motherly, perhaps, but it was oddly refreshing, especially in a place like this. As she carried you through the catacombs, she explained about where exactly you’d fell; turns out there was a whole community under this mountain. A community filled with monsters. 

The thought, at any other time, would’ve made you snort. 

Then again, you’d fallen right into it, so maybe laughing and acting like this was some cruel prank wasn’t the best idea right now. 

Your right ankle was completely numb, and honestly, you were getting worried. What if your foot was unusable after this? What if it had to be chopped off or something?

Toriel had managed to put your mind at ease on a number of matters, but the idea of losing your foot still tortured you. 

As you travelled through the ruins, you noticed the other monsters eyeing you curiously. A stray Froggit here, an odd Loox there (Toriel had been kind enough to tell you their names upon coming into contact with them), but thankfully, no sign of Flowey. 

Maybe the little bastard had slithered into a hole to die or something. 

_God,_ you hoped so. 

 

“...We’re here, my child.”

Toriel’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts, and you glanced up, staring in shock at the little house that sat, quite snugly, in the ruins. 

You weren’t gonna lie, it looked almost...out of place. Too cramped. Too tidy. 

The inside, however, was the opposite. 

Not in the tidiness department, mind you; the place was _spotless._

You figured the house must’ve expanded into the mountain a little. After all, there was no way all these rooms could fit inside that tiny-looking home. 

Toriel set you down gently on a soft-feeling chair, and you couldn’t help but lean back into the cushions. Your body was feeling heavy, and your head was sluggish. 

You put it down to exhaustion and not down to the small wriggling thought that you were insane. 

You glanced around the room groggily as Toriel stepped away from you for a moment. The room was big, yet oddly enough, it didn’t feel particularly bare or cold. You glanced to your left, noticing that there was a fireplace; embers licking at the firewood hungrily. It felt nice. 

“How are you feeling, my child? Are you still in pain?”

Toriel’s soft murmur caused you to turn and look at her. She was towering above you, a gentle smile on her face. 

“Oh, I’m...I can’t really...feel my foot any more...and I kinda ache all over, but-”

“Oh dear...you poor thing...” she interrupted you with a sad sigh, kneeling down in front of you to inspect your injured ankle. You flinched a little, but remained as still as possible. You didn’t want to offend her. 

You couldn’t manage to hold in the whimper of pain as Toriel pulled your boot slowly off your injured foot, bringing your sock down with it. 

The skin was very clearly swollen, and dark purple bruising was already blistering the area. You could even see the prominent bump of your talus; it was a lot larger than usual, and very uneven. 

You were positive. Your ankle was wrecked to shit. Definitely broken.

“I’ll try my best to heal what I can. But you will have to take it easy on this leg for a while, alright?”

Her words made you raise an eyebrow in confusion. Just what did she mean? Surely she wasn’t serious about healing _this?_ There was no way she had the medical tools for something like-

You sucked in a shocked breath as Toriel placed her furry paws against your swollen, bruised skin and exhaled, closing her eyes. 

And then you felt it. 

It was warm, and made you sleepy. The feeling felt like the sun hitting your skin, and you couldn’t help but close your eyes and hum at the extraordinary feeling. 

You had to admit, you hadn’t felt so content in a long time. 

And then, as quickly as it had appeared, the feeling was gone, leaving you feeling very cold and empty. Your eyes slid open slowly, suddenly feeling heavier than they had before. 

“There we are. I’ve tried my best with realigning the bones, but I think it would be best if you kept walking on it to a minimum, at least until I’m sure it’s set properly.”

You glanced down, reaching down to touch the now un-bruised skin of your ankle with amazement in your eyes. 

It...It didn’t hurt any more. 

“...How did you do that?”

“I’m quite well-versed in healing magic, dear. Trust me, I’ve had worse injuries to deal with than a broken ankle.”

Your head snapped up, and you stared at her in shock. 

“...Magic?”

You suddenly felt very stupid. 

You were trapped underground with a community full of monsters. Of course magic would come into play. 

“Yes, young one. Magic. I know it’s not really something humans practise, but...most monsters are made up of magic. It runs through us like blood does for you.”

Well, that made sense. As much sense as anything could at this point.

“Oh! Where are my manners? I was supposed to make tea!” Toriel hopped to her feet, clapping her paws together as she sent you a cheerful smile. 

“And isn’t this lovely? I also made a butterscotch cinnamon pie today as well! I’ll go grab you a slice right away!”

Toriel scurried past you into what you assumed was the kitchen, leaving you alone with your thoughts. 

Glancing around you once again, you realised the feeling you’d been picking up on since you’d first laid eyes on this room. 

Your mind formed the words as you closed your eyes, too tired to stay awake. 

It didn’t feel barren or cold. It felt lonely.

 

You’d been living with Toriel for over a week now. 

The monster had been incredibly generous; offering to show you around the ruins, baking you treats, sitting in front of the fire with you. She’d even carried you to bed when you’d been too tired to hobble your own way there; you’d always wake up with the covers wrapped snugly around you, and more often than not, a slice of still-warm pie waiting for you. 

It was nice. Incredibly nice. You’d even chosen to write about it and her in the little journal you carried with you all the time. Hey, what could you say, you were a sucker for documenting important shit.

You were just waiting for it all to go wrong. 

You weren’t going to get comfortable. You kept telling yourself that. She was going to be just like everyone else. She’d eventually get sick of you, and then she’d tell you to leave. 

She’d leave you alone. 

That’s why you had to leave before it got to that point. You’d rather be the one doing the hurting rather than being hurt. 

“Oh, _____, listen to this one! Snails can lift up to ten times their own body weight! How interesting! They’d make pretty good body builders!”

She was, however, making it extremely difficult to make a move. She always seemed to have her sights set on you, which gave you little leeway to make your escape. You were convinced there was a way out of the ruins from her house; that staircase that sat in the entranceway. You were sure of it. 

“Oh, and this one! Did you know that snails are actually nocturnal? They don’t favour sunlight very much, which is why they are often seen on cloudy days!”

“I...didn’t know that, Toriel.”

You sat in front of the fire, warming your body by it as you listened to the goat monster who sat in her reading chair, analysing a page from a book she’d been reading. Something about uses for snails. Or facts about snails. To be honest, you weren’t really sure why anyone would want to know anything about snails. 

Sure, their shells were pretty, and they had those cool little antennae eye thingies, but other than that, they were slimy and weird-looking. 

“And this one! Did you know that some snails have lived over 25 years! Amazing! I didn’t know such a small creature could live so long!”

“Um...Toriel, I...hate to interrupt, but...can I ask you something?”

It was now or never. You had to leave. You couldn’t stay here longer. No matter how much you wanted to. 

“What is it, my dear?” Toriel asked, closing her book to look at you with a smile. 

“I...well, I was thinking that...you’ve been awfully nice to me, and I really appreciate it, but...I think it’s time that I...moved on...”

You looked away, choosing to stare at the flames that lapped at the firewood.

“I...I have to go...”

There was silence, and you honestly felt like cringing. You knew this would happen. She was going to get angry at you, she was going to yell, to throw you out. 

“My child...is that really what you want?”

“H-Huh?” You looked up at her, seeing the sadness and worry swirling in her eyes, before turning away, biting at your lip. 

“I, uh...yes...I’ve decided...I can’t stay here...I’m becoming a burden to you, and-”

“_____, you’re not a burden.”

Her voice was stern, and you cringed slightly as her words hit deep at your heart. 

“You’re not a burden. Not to me, or anyone else. You’ve been one of the kindest, most sincerest humans to have ever fallen down into the Underground. It’s been a pleasure to have you living here with me.”

You closed your eyes, gulping hard. You didn’t need to hear this. Not now. 

“However...if you felt like you must go, then...I will not stop you...I can understand that it must...be very lonely here. You must miss your family and the surface.”

That made you think. To be honest, you hadn’t even thought once about returning to the surface since you’d met Toriel. The woman had distracted you, given you a break away from the evil thoughts and memories that lurked just above the surface.

You weren’t going back up there. That much you were sure of. 

You were perfectly content with wasting away down here in the Underground. 

“But you must be prepared for what’s to come. If you do leave the safety of the ruins, then you must know that...if he finds you, he will kill you...Asgore will kill you...”

The name rang a bell; you’d read about him in one of the many books that littered Toriel’s bookshelf. If you weren’t mistaken, he was the King of the entire Underground. 

“The King desires your soul. Human souls are the only way to break the barrier containing us...so please...if you can...stay out of sight...please...”

Toriel hunched over in her seat, her eyes dull with sadness. You felt a little bad, but it was too late to turn back now. This was for the best. You knew it. 

“I...I would’ve liked for you to stay with me a little longer, my dear _____,” she sighed, shaking her head, “however...it looks like this is where we go our separate ways...come...I will lead you out into the Underground...”

She stood from her seat, before walking out of the living room. You stumbled to your feet, grabbing your bag and taking one last look at the room you’d spent the last week in, before following her. 

No going back now. 

You followed Toriel down the stairs, which lead into a long hallway. You could hear the faint whistling of the wind, signalling that there was, indeed, a world that lay beyond the ruins. 

She was silent as she walked, and it gave you plenty of time to think. 

Just what was awaiting you in the world outside? Sure, you had Asgore to worry about, but what about other monsters? What if there were monsters out there like Flowey, who wanted to hurt or kill you just for the sake of killing? 

You thought it best to ignore that thought for now. 

Toriel slowed to a stop in front of a large door, and you gulped, looking up at the woman as she turned to look at you with a resigned expression. 

“...This is where I must leave you, my child,” she murmured slowly, a frown plastered on her face, “as much as it pains me to do so...”

“I’ll be fine.”

You hadn’t meant for the words to leave your mouth, but they did, anyway. 

Toriel paused, taking in your words for a moment. 

And then she smiled. A sad smile, almost hollow, yet understanding.

“Of course you will be.”

She knelt down in front of you, her eyes boring into your own. 

“You’ve been through worse, after all...haven’t you?”

Your eyes widened, but before you could say anything, Toriel enveloped you in a tight hug. Her paws patted your back gently, and you found yourself winding your arms around her as well, closing your eyes and leaning into her fur. She smelt like firewood and cinnamon. It was a nice smell. 

She slowly pulled away, offering you a quivering grin. 

“Protect your soul, dear one. Protect it, nurture it. Do not be afraid to seek companionship. It will help you heal...it will fill the cracks...goodbye, my dear _____...”

She rose to her feet, and with one last pat on the head, she was gone, walking past you and back into the ruins. 

 

You stood there for a long while, running through her words over and over again in your head. How had she known? Just from spending a little time with her, she’d learned the ins and outs of you. Just...how was that meant to work, exactly?

You shook your head, steeling yourself. Now wasn’t the time for worrying about those things. 

You had to go out into the Underground. You had to see for yourself what this world could offer you. 

For the first time in over a year, you were filled with DETERMINATION. 

No going back now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's making an appearance next chapter~
> 
> Also, just a heads up for those of you who were confused; this is set BEFORE Frisk falls into the Underground. 
> 
> ~Dawn~


	3. THE ONE WHERE YOU PLAY DOCTOR WITH A WALKING HALLOWEEN DECORATION

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I managed to update on time. Next week might not be promising, though.
> 
> Long story short, a family member of mine is very sick. So I'm trying to spend as much time as I possibly can with him before he...goes. This is making me very low, and my motivation is practically non-existent right now. I'm still gonna try to write, but I'm not gonna promise anything for the next couple of weeks. 
> 
> If things take a drastic turn for the worst, I'll be sure to post a chapter with an update. 
> 
> Enjoy this chapter, anyway.
> 
> ~Dawn~

You honestly didn’t know what you were expecting when you left the ruins.

A series of tunnels maybe, or some amazing cave system at the very least. 

What you weren’t expecting was snow. 

And a shit-ton of it. 

You cringed as a blast of cold wintry air hit your face, and you covered yourself as best as you could, moving forward so the door could slam shut behind you. 

Maybe you should’ve asked Toriel if you could have a coat or something. That was, if she even had a coat; being a goat and having lovely, warm fur was pretty convenient in a place like this. You guessed she wouldn’t need one. 

Shaking your head a little, you glanced around you. The area was thick with trees, and a little path had been etched into the snow, giving you a walkway fairly free of the frozen water. 

You sighed deeply, before jostling the small backpack you had on your back, and wrapping your arms around yourself.

“Okay, _____...first thing’s first...somewhere warm...and, off we go...”

You felt the determination practically pulsing in your veins, and you lifted your head, staring straight ahead as you started to walk. Your nerves had been on edge when you’d first stepped out here, but now that you looked around, this place was quiet and pretty. And there didn’t even seem to be any monsters or-

_SNAP!_

You let out a sharp gasp as you heard a loud noise from behind you, and you spun around, gulping hard. 

Nothing. 

Okay, scratch that previous thought; this place was fucking terrifying. 

“...Nope,” you muttered, turning on your heel and picking up the pace. Whatever that was, you weren’t going to stick around and find out. 

You noticed the outline of something tall, and began to jog, hoping that it was at least something you could climb. You didn’t know if monsters could climb, but eh, you’d probably find out soon enough. 

You opened your mouth in amazement as you realised what the tall thing was; it appeared to be a gate of some sorts. However, the gaps between the wooden pillars were large, and you had no doubt that something like this would fail easily at keeping things out. 

Then again, maybe it was for keeping something in...?

“...hey.”

The deep voice that greeted you was right next to your ear, and you flinched, your breath hitching in your throat. 

“what’s the matter? you look a little... _rattled_...”

You stared straight ahead, not wanting to look the monster in the eyes. You felt a bead of sweat travel down your face, and your body went cold. 

“...well, don’t be rude. turn around and lemme see your face, kid.”

_Just do what he says. Just do that, and maybe he won’t kill you,_ you thought frantically, before gulping hard, and swivelling round on your feet to face the monster.

You felt something in your right ankle twinge painfully, and you let out a choked gasp.

“Shit!” you hissed, your eyes darting down to your once-thought healed ankle, and you sunk to the floor, clutching at the throbbing skin. The snow-covered ground was freezing, but you didn’t care. You just wanted the pain to go away.

“well, i...ah...wasn’t expecting that...you...you okay, kid? that sounded pretty painful...”

You heard the snow squishing as the monster moved closer, kneeling down to your level, but you kept your eyes on your injury, rubbing circles around the aching area. 

“I-I’m fine...it’s nothing...”

“doesn’t seem like nothing. here, lemme take a look.”

“N-No, really, I’m-”

Your eyes darted up, wanting to decline the monster’s offer to help, but the words died in your throat as you caught a glimpse of his face. 

“...fine...”

Your eyes widened as the skeleton - an actual _fucking_ skeleton, of all things - locked eyes with you, and the grin that plastered his face grew ever so slightly. 

You mind went blank.

And then you screamed. 

 

“wow. rude.”

The skeleton snorted a little as you pressed your back up against one of the wooden pillars, trembling. 

You’d been expecting...well, you didn’t really know what you’d been expecting, but it certainly hadn’t been a fucking skeleton.

“although, i guess i’ll let it slide, since you’re hurt. you’re lucky i’m so laid back, kid. otherwise, i might have had a _bone_ to pick with you.”

You watched silently as his eyebrows - how the fuck did he even...y’know what, don’t question it - raised slightly, as if he was waiting for your reaction to something. 

You stared at him for a moment longer. 

And then it hit you. 

Honestly, you wanted to smash your head against a wall. 

“...T-that joke was terrible...” you whispered, tearing your eyes away from the skeleton to look back at your injured ankle. You weren’t really sure what had happened; it had felt perfectly fine up until the moment you’d turned, but you’d remembered Toriel mentioning something about taking it easy regardless. Then again, you’d been running on it a little bit, and it had felt fine then...

“oh, i know. it got you to smile, though.”

You froze, and your eyes widened in shock. Smiling? You hadn’t felt yourself smile. In fact, the joke was more irritating than funny...

You flinched slightly as the skeleton knelt down back beside you, his pinprick pupils staring at you intently. 

“i think you and i have gotten off on the wrong foot. lemme start again,” he paused, before holding his bony hand out to you, “name’s sans. sans the skeleton.”

Sans. Well, it certainly had a nice ring to it, you’d give him that. 

“...and this is the part where you usually take my hand and say, ‘hi, i’m whoever!’ or something. y’know, like any normal person/monster would.”

A little startled, you grasped his hand without thinking, gulping as you felt the cold, smooth feeling of bone against your fingertips. 

“...I’m _____...”

“_____, huh? nice. kinda catchy,” he commented, nodding to himself as he shook your hand.

“I...I’m sorry for...screaming at you...it’s just that...” you started, suddenly feeling bad. 

“you weren’t expecting a skeleton?” he countered knowingly, his grin widening as he stood slowly, “eh, don’t worry about it, kid. i get that i’m pretty frightening. not something you’re used to, huh?”

“N-not really...”

“it’s cool. although, if you ask anyone else, they’ll tell you what a nice guy i am. tons of monsters think so. a _skele-ton_ , even.”

“...That was...kind of a long shot...”

“eh, they can’t all be grade-a material.”

You looked down at your ankle again, wincing as your entire foot throbbed uncomfortably. 

“you want me to take a look at that?”

“Huh? Oh...I...I guess...?”

You glanced up at him, watching as he held out his hand for you again. 

“let’s get you out of the cold, first. you look like you’re...chilled to the _bone_...”

“...Please stop...”

 

The waft of warm air that hit your face as you limped through the door was a god-send. 

Sans had led you through the snowy forest and the town that sat in the middle of it with relative ease; he’d offered you a short cut, but you’d kindly declined when he mentioned he had to rip through space to do it. No matter how much pain you were in, you weren’t taking that kind of risk. 

You’d read too much sci-fi to know where shit like that would lead. 

“home sweet home. at least it’s warm in here,” Sans murmured as he followed in after you, closing the door shut behind him, “go take a seat on the couch and i’ll take a look at ya.”

You nodded, more to yourself than to him, before hobbling over to the couch and slumping down on it; the cushions dipping into a comfortable seat for you. 

You leaned your head back into the couch, listening as Sans shuffled past you, muttering something about looking for tools to help. 

Well, that didn’t sound too inviting. But the skeleton had seemed nice enough to you, so you were going to give him the benefit of the doubt. 

You just hoped he’d rightfully earned your trust. 

Thinking back to when Toriel had inspected your ankle the first time, you made a conscious effort to slip your boot off your injured foot; the task proving more than a little difficult. Slipping your sock down, you winced as you noticed the skin turning purple. 

“...That doesn’t look good...”

“you said it.”

You flinched, your eyes darting to Sans who stood right in front of you, a roll of bandages in his hand. So that’s what he meant by tools...you guessed that made sense...

“Oh, um...yeah.”

“lemme see?”

You paused for a moment, before lifting your leg up a little. Sans knelt down on the floor by your injured foot, his eyesockets trained on the bruising swollen skin as he reached up to touch it. 

You winced a little as his fingertips came into contact with your skin; the feeling of smooth bone against you was a little weird, but not entirely unpleasant. 

“you can’t move it, right?”

You shook your head. 

“I’m not even gonna try. It hurts now, and I’m not even doing anything.”

“hm.”

Sans sat back, rubbing at his lower jaw slowly, pondering. You watched him silently for a while, before opening your mouth to speak. 

“...Are you a doctor, Sans?”

“what?”

That caught his attention. You glanced up into his face, feeling a little nervous as he stared at you blankly. 

“You...just seem so serious. You...kinda had your game face on, so I just figured that...you knew what you were doing and all...”

“...heh.”

Your eyes widened as he let out a chuckle, which slowly evolved into a carefree laugh. You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle along with him; his laughter was contagious. 

“now that...that’s funny...you’re a pretty good comedian, kid,” he sighed, shaking his head slowly, “nah, i’m not a doctor. just a sentry. i’ve just got a little brother, so i kinda know how to deal with scrapes and snaps and stuff.”

“You have a brother?”

You watched as San’s eyesockets lit up at the mention of his brother, and he nodded. 

“yeah, he’s pretty cool. really tall. kinda loud. but cool.”

“He sounds nice.”

He nodded in response, quickly going back to examining your foot. 

You both slipped into a comfortable silence, and you leaned your head back against the couch cushions, your eyes sliding shut as you exhaled slowly. You almost felt like you could fall asleep. 

“...what about you?”

“Hm?”

“you have any siblings? brothers or sisters? annoying cousins?”

Your body went cold. Slowly gulping down your disgust at the mention of family, you opened your eyes, letting out a small chuckle that you hoped sounded genuine. 

“Oh...no, nothing like that. I’m an only child...” you paused, before looking past Sans and to the window, where you watched the snow that had begun to fall outside, “in fact, I don’t really have any family...”

“no parents?”

You shook your head, biting down the pain in your chest as you did so. 

“None.”

Sans went silent, and for that you were grateful. Your mind was preoccupied with thoughts of your family and friends, and honestly, it hurt to think about. 

Were they looking for you? Were they so worried that they had tried to find you? You hadn’t exactly left them much of a trail in the first place...

Did they even really care?

“...there. all done.”

You were broken out of your inner turmoil by San’s voice, and you glanced his way, eyeing your now bandaged ankle quietly. 

“can’t really do much at the moment, since the damage is still fresh,” he said with a sigh, shrugging, “just give it a few days to heal up by itself, and then we’ll take a crack at it with some magic. sound good?”

You nodded, lifting your leg up, perching your injured foot on the edge of the couch carefully. 

“Thank you. You didn’t have to do this, though; I’m sure I could’ve taken care of it myself...”

“nah, my fault it happened. i shouldn't have spooked ya...sorry about that, by the way,” he cracked a crooked smile, scratching the back of his skull as he stood. He stretched a little, reaching up on his tiptoes as he did so, before letting out a yawn and slumping down beside you. 

“It’s okay, Sans. I’m sure it would’ve been funny if my foot hadn’t...done whatever the hell it did.”

“you still probably would’ve screamed, though.”

“...Yeah, you’re probably right...”

“hey, i get it, i’m not really eye-candy. it’s cool. what i lack in looks, i make up with my charm and sense of humour.”

“I...didn’t say that. You’re...charming. In your own weird way...”

“i’ll take that as a compliment.”

“I meant it as one, just so we’re clear...sorry, I haven’t met many monsters, so...this is still kinda new to me...”

“it’s okay. i haven’t met many humans, so same here.”

The two of you slipped into silence once again, and you closed your eyes. This was nice. Just sitting next to someone, enjoying their company, talking about anything. You hadn’t done this in so long...

“...hey, kid.”

“...Yeah?”

Silence followed, and you cracked open an eye, watching him as he glanced at you, the smile he’d worn practically the entire time gone from his face, replaced with a serious look that made you more than a little nervous. 

“...don’t take this the wrong way, but...what happened to your so-”

“BROTHER! I’M HOME!”

Your head shot in the direction of the door as it slammed open, and your eyes widened as you saw the figure of San’s younger brother in the doorway. 

... _Holy fuck._


	4. THE ONE WHERE YOU TRY TO EXPLAIN SKIN TO SKELETONS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update. I didn't think I was gonna be able to post at all today, if I'm honest.
> 
> **This is a warning in advance; this chapter contains mentions of self-harm. I know you're probably all aware, since it's in the tags, but I thought it best to warn you guys anyway.**
> 
> Thanks for your support, guys. It's nice to know people enjoy my writing. Enjoy.
> 
> ~Dawn~

“...Okay, and now you add the sauce.”

“I STILL DON’T SEE HOW THIS IS THE PROPER WAY TO MAKE SPAGHETTI, BUT...ALRIGHT.”

 

You weren’t gonna lie, standing in the kitchen helping a 6ft plus skeleton make spaghetti wasn’t exactly how you had planned to spend your day. But Papyrus had insisted that you helped him make dinner and, since you’d been on house arrest for going on five days, you had no choice. 

But hey, you owed it to the skeleton brothers. They had been letting you stay with them, even if Papyrus insisted it was just until you got better. There was no doubt you would’ve been captured, or even killed by now, if Sans hadn’t offered you protection. 

 

Sighing, you stepped to the side, moving to wash your hands in the sink. 

“Well, this is just how I was taught, Papyrus. There’s a lot of ways to make it.”

“REALLY? DO YOU THINK YOU COULD SHOW ME THEM, TOO?”

Your hands froze as you reached for the soap, and you pondered for a second, before smiling at him sweetly. 

“I don’t know...I suppose that all depends on whether you’re going to turn me in to Undyne, doesn’t it?”

You watched in amusement as Papyrus jolted, his body straight as he assessed your words. He glanced round at you, his eyesockets narrowing when he saw you smiling at him. 

He turned on his heel, stabbing a sauce-covered spoon in your direction. 

“MAKE NO MISTAKE, HUMAN, I STILL PLAN ON HANDING YOU OVER TO UNDYNE. IT’S JUST...YOU ARE INJURED, SO...MAYBE NOW WOULDN’T BE THE BEST TIME. BESIDES, SANS TOLD ME NOT TO, SO...”

“Well, aren’t you sweet~” You huffed out, before moving to gather some soap in your hands, rinsing them under the warm water thoroughly. 

“i hope you’re not picking on my bro, _____.”

You let out a shriek as a deep voice echoed right by your ear, and you spun around, flinging water in all directions. 

“...well, would’ya look at that. i’m wetter than i’ve been all day. _and_ i’ve been on shift in waterfall.”

“Sans!” you sighed, placing a hand on your chest as you tried to calm your rapid heartbeat, “don’t _do_ that!”

Sans shrugged, offering you a shit-eating grin in response as he wiped his skull free of soapy water.

“not my fault you scare easily.”

“BROTHER! YOU SHOULDN’T BE SO HARD ON THE HUMAN,” Papyrus said, turning to address his brother, “SHE HAS BEEN HELPING ME MAKE SPAGHETTI!”

“huh. you don’t say,” Sans said, eyeing the bowl of freshly-made pasta, “looks good, pap.”

“OF COURSE IT DOES! WITH THE SKILLS OF BOTH HUMAN AND MONSTER COMBINED, THERE’S NO DOUBT THAT THIS WILL BE THE GREATEST PASTA IN THE ENTIRE UNDERGROUND! NO, THE ENTIRE WORLD!”

Papyrus took a moment to strike a pose, placing his hand on his chest proudly. You shook your head, smiling as you turned back to the sink. 

“Okay, Papyrus. I’m gonna set the table. You wash your hands, okay?”

“OKAY!”

“And, Sans? Don’t go disappearing; dinner’s ready, so go and sit down.”

“yes, mother.”

“Don’t sass me, young man.”

You cracked a smile as he snorted in response, before moving to the drawers to set the table.

“...y’know, i was thinking,” Sans began as he sat down, leaning his head on his hands, “you’ve been here a few days now, and you seem to be faring a bit better on that foot of yours. want me to take a look at it after dinner?”

“If you want to,” you said, inwardly cringing, “if it’s too much trouble, you don’t have to.”

“it ain’t any trouble,” he waved his hand in your direction dismissively, “we have to take a look sooner or later. it ain’t gonna get better if we ignore it.”

“That’s true...”

Your body went cold at the thought of Sans looking at your foot. What if it was healed enough? Would he send you on your way? 

You hated to admit it, but you didn’t want to leave. This little game that you’d been playing; this little life you’d been living for the past few days with the two skeletons had been nice. Pleasant. 

It was the kind of life you wished you’d had on the surface. Living with friends, messing around and playing off each other and just enjoying life. 

It was nice. 

You didn’t want to lose that. Not now that you had it.

 

“HUMAN? ARE YOU ALRIGHT? YOU’VE BEEN STARING AT THE KNIVES FOR ALMOST A MINUTE, NOW.”

You flinched, glancing back at Papyrus as he stood by your side, eyeing you curiously. 

“Y-yeah, Papyrus...just spaced out, is all...I’m okay...”

“you sure?”

There was a tone in San’s voice that made your thoughts sour immediately, but you pushed it to the side. The last thing you wanted was to get mad at him for showing you pity. Even if you didn’t want it. 

“Yeah...c’mon, let’s eat!” 

You spun on your heels, carefully lifting your injured leg off the floor before doing so to stop yourself from twisting it too much, before walking over to the table, cutlery in hand.

You plastered your face with the cheeriest smile you could, trying your hardest to ignore the feeling of unhappiness that loomed over you. 

But when you met Sans gaze, you felt that smile slowly vanish, and the dread wash over you. 

You didn’t want this. You didn’t want this. You didn’t want this.

 

“...okay. you ready? this is gonna sting a little, but once the bandage is off, it should feel a little better...at least, i think so. never really healed a human before, so...”

You nodded, more to yourself than to him, bracing yourself against the arm of the couch. Dinner had been a disaster; Sans had kept shooting you concerned looks from across the table, and now you just wanted to get away from him. 

But you’d promised him that you’d let him look at the damage. So, against your better judgement, here you were. 

You winced as you felt Sans fingers against the bandage, slowly unclipping and unravelling it. You inhaled deeply, trying to keep the discomfort from your face. 

You were expecting a lot of things. 

But Sans yelling out “shit!” was not one of them.

Your eyes shot down to your now unravelled ankle, attempting to pull it up to look at it, panic setting in. 

You bit back a yelp as Sans pulled at your leg, keeping you still. 

“don’t move it! you might make it worse!” he said, his voice shaky with shock. 

“Lemme see!” you countered, your voice an octave higher due to the pain and fear. 

“WHAT’S WRONG?” Papyrus’s voice echoed from the kitchen, and moments later, he jogged into the room, opening his mouth to speak. 

His eyes locked on your ankle. 

And then he let out a scream. 

“OH MY GOD, SANS! WHAT DID YOU DO?!”

“i didn’t do anything! it was like this when i unravelled it!”

“WELL DON’T JUST SIT THERE! DO SOMETHING!”

“what do you want me to do?! i don’t know what i’m doing!”

“OH GOD, SANS! WHAT IF SHE DIES? WHAT IF WE KILLED THE HUMAN?”

“Don’t say that!” you shrieked, “just lemme...look...”

You weren’t really sure what you were supposed to be looking at. Sure, your ankle was still swollen to hell, but your bruising had gone down; the once purple skin now yellowed out. That was a good sign, at least. 

“...Am I missing something?” you asked quietly, cocking your head to the side to get a better look at your foot, “what’s the problem here?”

“are you blind?” Sans voice was harsh, and still laced with panic, “your skin, it’s...”

“IT’S YELLOW! IT’S CHANGING COLOUR AND THAT’S NEVER A GOOD SIGN, HUMAN! NEVER A GOOD SIGN!”

You paused for a moment, comprehending their words. 

And then you let out a small chuckle. 

“I...guys...it’s supposed to do that.”

“huh?” 

“It...when bruises heal, they change colour. It’s a good thing. It shows that the skin is healing like it should. I...can’t really say much about the bones, but the swelling seems to have gone down a little, so...”

“W...WOWIE...HUMANS ARE REALLY WEIRD!” Papyrus let out a sigh of relief, wiping the non-existent sweat from his brow. 

“...that’s _amazing._ ”

You turned to Sans, watching him as he stared at the healing bruise cautiously. 

“why does it do that? bruise, i mean.”

Well, that was a question you never thought you’d have to answer. But, then again, you never would’ve thought you’d be sitting in a living room with two skeletons, so you guessed anything was possible. 

“Well, when skin is damaged, the human body often bleeds. Sometimes damage can be done without breaking the skin. My body still bleeds, though, just internally. That purple bruise from a few days ago? That was actually me bleeding on the inside. The cells in my body then work to heal the damaged area, which results in it changing colour. The less damage, the less internal bleeding. Does that make sense?”

Sans nodded, his eyesockets wide in fascination. 

“i didn’t know you could do that.”

“Well, it’s not really me consciously doing it; it’s just something my body instinctively does. To protect me, y’know?”

“what else can it do? does it work with cuts and stuff, too?”

“Yeah. When a person gets cut, the blood will clot the wound. It’s not something that happens immediately, but...then, after a while, the blood will dry, and leave a scab. It’s...kinda ugly to look at, but it’s usually a good sign. After a while, the scab will fade, but if the cut’s deep enough, it’ll scar. Here, I’ll-”

Your words got caught in your throat, and you froze, your arm poised to roll back your sleeve. You faintly heard Sans call your name in confusion, but you couldn’t focus. 

A sudden feeling of disgust welled in the pit of your stomach, and you tucked your arms close to your body, looking down into your lap. You heard Sans calling your name again, and you flinched when you felt him touch your knee gently. 

“Sorry,” you whispered, refusing to look at him, “I...I don’t wanna talk about it any more.”

Why had you gone to do that? Your scars weren’t something you were proud of; they were a constant reminder of how weak, how powerless you felt. So why did you go to show them off? 

You hated this. You needed to get away. Your head was hurting. 

You inhaled sharply as you felt a bony hand touch your head, patting you gently. 

“it’s okay. if you don’t wanna talk about it, it’s cool. sorry for bombarding ya with questions.”

You glanced up as Sans let out a yawn, stretching a little; wincing as his bones popped. 

“well, i’m off to bed. bro, you want to get ready, too? i’ll read ya your bed time story.”

Papyrus glanced at you warily, before nodding. 

“IF THE HUMAN IS REALLY OKAY, THEN...YES, I THINK IT’S TIME I GO TO BED! GOODNIGHT, HUMAN!”

Papyrus bolted up the stairs and into his room, his door swinging shut behind him. 

You sucked in a shaky breath, trying to calm yourself, before you felt another pat against your hair. 

“hey. i really am sorry.”

And for the first time since you’d met the small skeleton, you really thought those words came from his heart.


	5. THE ONE WHERE YOU REALISE YOU WRITE TOO MUCH

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit of a test. I kinda wanted to see how it worked with the rest of the fic itself. Also, I'm trying to bring the Reader's journal into play a bit more. To make a long story short, it'll be important later on, so I wanted to mention it early. 
> 
> Another thing; next week there will be NO UPDATE. As you've probably read, I'm going through some personal issues right now regarding a very sick family member, so my top priority is to be with them. 
> 
> Cancer's an absolute bitch, amiright?
> 
> Anyway, thank you so much for your continued support; you have no idea how much I appreciate it. Every time I see someone leave kudos or a comment, it makes me happy. So, thank you. 
> 
> Enjoy.
> 
> ~Dawn~

_Date - 23 - 02 - 20XX_

_I’m scared. I’m really fucking scared right now holy shit. I woke up and I was in a bed and oh shit I don’t remember how I got here. I think I fell down a hole in the mountain or something but I don’t know._

_My leg’s bandaged up. It kinda stings a bit when I move it, but other than that, it seems okay. I should probably get out of this place but I don’t know where I am and holy shit..._

_I’m really scared. I kinda wish I’d never come up to this stupid mountain, now. Have I been kidnapped? I’ve been kidnapped, haven-_

_I remember._

_Holy shit I remember._

_That flower - that motherfucking flower - tried to kill me and that lady saved me. That monster lady._

_She just came into the room to check on me. She looked worried. That’s never a good sign. What the fuck is wrong with me?_

_Besides the obvious, of course._

_She’s cooking now. I can smell it._

_It smells nice._

_Date - 24 - 02 - 20XX_

_Toriel._

_It’s a pretty name._

_It’s a very pretty name. It rolls off my tongue really nicely._

_It’s very regal-sounding. I wonder if she’s royalty?_

_She had me helping in the garden today. If you can call it that._

_She had me picking up all the dead leaves around the tree that stands there, wilted, in the middle of it._

_It gave me the creeps. I felt sick and had to go inside after a little while._

_It feels like I’m being watched._

_Date - 26 - 02 - 20XX_

_I can’t get wifi down here._

_Which sucks since I really wanna watch all the shows I’ve been missing out on._

_I wonder if monsters have their own version of wifi that I don’t know about?_

_Maybe I’ll ask Toriel._

_Update: Toriel doesn’t know what wifi is._

_Well that’s interesting._

_Date - 28 - 02 - 20XX_

_I miss TV._

_I miss hot showers._

_I miss sleeping soundly._

_I miss my friend._

_I miss giving them hugs when they least expect it. I miss them holding my hand as I fall asleep. I miss them sitting on the couch watching TV with me. I miss them putting a smile on my face when I thought smiling was impossible._

_I wonder if they care that I’m gone._

_Date - 29??? - 02 - 20XX_

_Is it a leap year? Maybe. None of the calenders Toriel has are in date, so._

_I feel safe around her. She’s loving, caring, just like a mother should be._

_I can’t stay here._

_She’ll leave me._

_I know she will. Just like they did. She’ll kick me to the curb like they did, and I’ll be alone._

_So I’ll leave before she can._

_I’ll take my chances outside of the RUINS._

_And who knows? Maybe if I’m lucky a monster will actually work up the courage to kill me._

_Update: Just checked my phone. It is a leap year._

_Suck it, regular out of date calenders._

_Date - 01 - 03 -20XX_

_I left the RUINS._

_Toriel seemed sad, but I guess she understood._

_Some of the things she said left a bad after taste, though._

_I’m in a town called Snowdin. Kinda funny, considering the place is covered in snow._

_Neat naming skills._

_My foot hurts again. I think it’s re-broken itself, which is complete and utter bullshit considering Toriel healed it just fine. I could walk on it fine a day ago._

_I met someone. He’s kind, too, like Toriel._

_Annnnd he’s a skeleton._

_A skeleton._

_Just wanted to emphasise that fact._

_A walking halloween decoration. Only with more clothes on and a shitty sense of humour._

_His name’s Sans._

_I like him._

_Date - 02 - 03 - 20XX_

_Okay I don’t like him as much any more._

_I got woken up this morning by his brother barrelling down the stairs yelling about breakfast spaghetti._

_Whatever the fuck that is._

_Papyrus seems nice, too. A little loud and excitable, but I can handle it. He seems kind-hearted, although he did say he wanted to turn me into the Royal Guard._

_Not really liking that idea. Thankfully he’s decided not to until my foot is better._

_Getting off track here._

_Papyrus. Breakfast spaghetti. Getting woken up at 5 in the morning, only for Papyrus to run out of the door and leave me groggy and confused._

_And then I hear that comical motherfucker snickering to himself from his doorway and I turn and there he is, shit-eating grin plastered on his face like he’d planned the whole thing, and all I can do is mouth ‘fuck you’ to him before laying back down on the couch and crashing for the next two hours._

_Asshole._

_He just made me coffee._

_Not as much of an asshole as he could’ve been._

_I’ll give him points for that._

_Date - 02 - 03 - 20XX_

_Sans has just asked what the points can be used for._

_Stop looking over my shoulder as I write._

_What do you mean, ‘no?’_

_Rude._

_...Friendship points. You gained friendship points._

_Happy now?_

_...Asshole._

_Date - 05 -03 - 20XX_

_I fucked up I fucked up I fucked up I fucked up._

_I’m so fucking stupid why did I do that???_

_I’m not proud of them. I hate them. I hate the looks people give me when they see them._

_So why did I do that? Why did I go to show them to him?_

_Stupid fucking scars._

_Should’ve killed myself when I made them years ago._

_Fucking useless._

_Just like they said._

_Fucking useless._


	6. THE ONE WHERE YOU FALL OFF A SEMI-COMFORTABLE COUCH

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I'm back. And boy has it been a stressful week. 
> 
> The sick family member I spent last week with passed away on Saturday. We were all expecting it, but it was still a low blow. The funeral's next week, so if I think that the next chapter isn't going to be up on time, I'll make sure to let you all know.
> 
> Thanks for being patient with me, guys. I really appreciate it.
> 
> ~Dawn~

It was dark. And the horrid stench that your nose picked up hinted that something horrible lurked in that darkness. 

You didn’t know how you’d ended up here. 

One minute you’d been sitting on the couch in Sans and Papyrus’s house, your head in your hands, and the next you were here. 

...God, it stank. What even was that? 

You gulped hard, placing a hand over your nose as you took an experimental step forwards, testing the ground beneath you. It felt...bouncy. 

Odd. And kinda off-putting, you guessed. 

Another step. Nothing new yet, except more darkness.

Another step. Another step. Another step. Another st-

You let out a yelp as you felt something grip at your ankle, forcing you to stop. Your eyes tore away from the darkness in front of you, causing instead to stare at what had grabbed you. 

Your blood went cold. 

**“...pLease, hUman...heLP us...?”**

You lurched back with a scream, pulling your leg out of it’s grasp and stumbling back. 

You didn’t know what this thing was, but for some reason, it felt familiar. 

It kinda reminded you of the Whimsum’s from the Ruins. Only...more liquefied and...creepy. 

**“a hUMan...? yES...yeS, theY CAn helP US...”**

**“HUman sOULS are quITe taSTy...”**

**“yOu smeLL NIce..."**

Your mind was thrown into a frenzy as you heard other voices, as contorted as the one from the demonic-looking Whimsum, echoing all around you. 

Your let out a cry of pain as your head was yanked back by small fingers, your scalp throbbing in protest as they tugged. 

“Let go!” you shrieked, scratching at the hands that gripped your hair, “Let go!”

**“whY? yOU smELL nicE...huNGry...”**

**“so huNgrY...so HUngry...”**

**“Bet yoU tasTE gooD...”**

The voices were all becoming one loud obnoxious hum that made your ears ache. You slammed your eyes shut, struggling against the creature’s hands as they tugged, moaned, grabbed...

A cold wash of wind unlike anything you’d ever experienced before crashed over your body, and you were completely chilled. The things that held you in place disappeared with disappointed groans, and you flopped to the ground, bouncing a little on it’s cushiony surface. 

_“Hmm... Interesting. So you‘re close to the void... Very interesting...”_

You didn’t dare look at who this new, distorted voice belonged to. You were too scared, too confused.

So when you felt a cold, smooth hand grip at your chin and lift it, you froze, your eyes shooting open in panic. 

Your mind went blank. 

And then the terror hit. 

 

Your eyes snapped open, and you let out a panicked shriek as you jolted upwards. The covers that were tangled around your body curled around you even more, and through your struggling, you managed to slip your backside off the couch you’d been laying on. 

You let out a groan mixed with a panicked sob as your butt hit hard against the carpeted floor, sending pain shooting up your spine. 

You simply sat there for what seemed like an eternity, trembling and sobbing as you tried to regain your grip on reality. 

Just what was that, exactly? A nightmare? You’d never had a nightmare quite that vivid before, though...

“you alright?”

You flinched as a deep voice hit your ears, and your head snapped up, your eyes quickly adjusting to the new addition. Sans stood in front of you in a simple white t-shirt and shorts, carrying his pillow and a blanket under his arm. He looked tired. 

As soon as he took in the tears sliding down your face, his eyesockets widened, and he shook his head as he knelt down beside you. 

“stupid question. sorry.”

You looked away, sniffling a little as you tried to get a handle on yourself. 

“you wanna sit on the couch? it’s a lot comfier than the floor.”

You shook your head quickly, attempting to lift your knees up and quickly failing. 

“...Can’t move just yet...” you managed to whisper, wincing as your voice croaked. 

“lemme help with that.”

You felt Sans lift your arm up and over his shoulder, supporting you as he began to lift you up. Your legs trembled terribly, and you clung to the small skeleton’s shirt desperately, cringing as you let out a pitiful squeak of a sob. 

Sans set you back on the couch, throwing the blanket over your form haphazardly, before slumping down next to you, sighing deeply. 

“nightmares, huh?”

The words took you off guard for a moment, and you inhaled deeply as you glanced at him through the corner of your eye. He stared straight ahead, his eyes dark and his smile hollow. You nodded slowly. 

“i know the feeling.”

“...You too...?” you murmured out, your voice a little more level than it had been a few moments ago. He nodded mutely, the lights in his eyes returning to glance at you. 

You’d never really noticed it before - probably because you’d never really looked properly - but San’s face held a great deal of emotion to it. Far more than you’d first thought. The small specks of light in his eyesockets were a quick give-away on his mood. 

You looked away, suddenly feeling more than a little nervous. You were sure that if his face could be read with ease, then yours could too. 

Not that you were really hiding anything at this moment in time; tears still streamed down your face, and you could feel your bottom lip quivering slightly. 

Yeah. Real secretive. 

“...you wanna talk about it?”

San’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts, and you looked at him warily, before shaking your head. You slowly lifted your legs up on the couch with you, careful to not hit your broken foot, before settling your chin on your knees. 

“...Just wanna forget...” you whispered, closing your eyes as a wave of cold crashed over you, chilling your body and making you shiver. You didn’t want to remember. You just wanted to forget...

“’kay.”

You didn’t know what it was about San’s voice in that moment, but you couldn’t help but feel extremely grateful to the small skeleton. 

You flinched as you felt something fuzzy and warm drape across your front, your hands quickly gripping at it. 

“...This is your blanket.”

“i’m aware.”

“But...I already have one.”

“you look like you need two.”

Your eyes widened as he shrugged, rubbing his eye sockets as he let out a yawn. 

“i’m gonna get some z’s. you should try, too, while you still can. paps’ll be up soon.”

“...R-Right...” you whispered, shifting your body deeper into the blankets and leaning your head against the back of the couch. 

Moments later, you heard San’s breathing - why on earth the skeleton needed to breathe, you had no idea - even out, and after a while, he let out a quiet hum of a snore. 

You couldn’t stop the smile that settled on your lips. 

With a small, quiet chuckle, you threw half of his blanket over him, covering his body, before settling down once again. Taking one last glance at the now sleeping skeleton, you allowed your eyes to close. 

“...Night, Sans...”

 

_Click!_

Your body jolted as a loud noise startled you awake, and you inhaled sharply, your head snapping upwards in shock and panic. 

“OH...HELLO, HUMAN. I DIDN’T MEAN TO WAKE YOU.”

Papyrus’s voice met your ears, and you heaved a sigh of relief, before moving to rub your blurry eyes. 

“...S’ok, Papyrus...what’re you doing? Is it time for you to go to work already?” you asked, and he nodded, stepping back as he grinned. 

“YES! THE GREAT PAPYRUS HAS TO MAKE SURE HE’S UP NICE AND EARLY TO GET READY FOR THE BUSY DAY AHEAD...BUT I MUST ADMIT, YOU DID DISTRACT ME A LITTLE. I WAS ABOUT TO LEAVE UNTIL I SAW YOU.”

You raised an eyebrow at him in confusion, before your eyes caught sight of the cell phone in his hand, the flash on. 

Everything clicked into place in an instant. 

“Papyrus, did you...take a photo of me sleeping?”

The tall skeleton stepped back, waving his hands in front of him furiously as he babbled a little. 

“N-NOT JUST YOU, HUMAN! LOOK!” he placed a gloved finger to his mouth in a shushing motion, before tilting his head a little. You slowly allowed your eyes to leave the lanky skeleton, pausing just a moment longer to glower at him, before looking at what Papyrus was so...enthralled about. 

“...Oh.”

How you hadn’t noticed it before, you didn’t know. 

You faintly remember Sans coming downstairs and calming you down from a nightmare a few hours ago, but you were sure that he would’ve gone back up to bed by now. 

What you hadn’t expected, was for him to still be sitting next to you, his eyesockets clamped tightly shut and his mouth slightly agape as he snored quietly, the beginnings of a smile forming on the corners of his jaws. 

Not to mention the way his head was leaning on your shoulder, or the way his bony hand had somehow managed to snag yours during the night and link your fingers together. 

“...Oh.”

You didn’t know what else to say. You really didn’t. 

If it hadn’t have been for his younger brother standing there, bright cheerful grin on his face, you would’ve cooed a little. 

Never in your life would you have thought you’d want to coo at a skeleton. 

Then again, Sans was a...special case. He didn’t exactly fit the stereotype for an ordinary skeleton. 

“HE LOOKS HAPPY.”

Papyrus’s voice caught you off guard a little, and you glanced up at him, trying not to jostle Sans any more than you already had. 

“HE WON’T ADMIT IT, BUT IT’S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I’VE SEEN HIM SMILE. REALLY SMILE.”

Your breath caught in your throat for a moment, and you stared at the tall skeleton silently. 

“...THANK YOU, HUMAN.”

You didn’t know what to say. You watched as Papyrus grinned at you cheerfully, before leaning down to rustle your hair gently. 

“TAKE CARE OF MY LAZY BROTHER WHILE I’M OUT TODAY, OKAY? I’M COUNTING ON YOU, MY FRIENDLY LITTLE HUMAN!”

And with that, he was gone, dashing out of the door and towards the so far unexplored areas of the Underground. 

Your eyes slowly looked down at your hand which was intertwined with Sans, and you began to trace the skeleton’s bones with your eyes. There were so many small ones; so many tiny little bones that held him all together to make him whole. 

Magic was an amazing thing. 

You sighed shakily, leaning your head back against the couch as you stared at the ceiling. Your mind was frazzled, thanks to Papyrus, and you weren’t really sure what was going through your mind. 

“...Shit. That damn picture...”

You’d have to get him to delete it off his phone later. Lord knows who the skeleton would show that to. No doubt the entirety of Snowdin would think you two were in some kind of weird human/monster partnership or something. 

Wait, did the monsters here even know what a human looked like? Besides Sans, of course. They all seemed pretty chill with you when the brothers had introduced you a couple of days prior. 

...Just how long had these guys been down here...?

“mmhh...”

A small grumble snapped you out of your thoughts, and you turned your head, instantly regretting it as your forehead came into contact with something hard and cold. 

“...Ow.”

You flinched back a little, reaching up to rub the sore spot on your head, before looking up. 

Your eyes widened. 

Sans sat upright, the tiny white pinpricks in his eyes almost non-existent as he stared straight at you. You felt a weird kind of...fizzle in the air - you’d never really felt anything like it before so you didn’t know how to describe it - and you inhaled sharply as you saw a faint blue-ish glow on Sans’ cheekbones. 

Was...was he blushing?

“...where am i?”

His voice was shaky and croaky, probably from him just waking up. You felt his fingers tense around yours slightly, and you felt a chill run down your spine. 

“You’re in your living room. You fell asleep sitting here with me,” you explained quietly, and as he took in your words, the slightly panicked expression dissolved from his face, leaving him looking groggy. 

“...oh. i remember now. thanks.”

“...Don’t mention it, Sans.”

“so...how long you been up? you know you coulda just moved. you didn’t have to wait for me to wake up.”

“Well, I would’ve, but...I’m kinda tangled up right now.”

You couldn’t stop the smirk that settled on your face as he stared at you in confusion, before glancing down to his hand, which still sat, quite snugly in yours. 

That fizzling sensation quickly turned into a more intense crackling.

“I’ll admit, I didn’t peg you as a hand-holder, Sans,” you teased lightly, allowing a small laugh to leave your mouth, “or a cuddler. My shoulder must be as comfy as your pillow, considering you laid on it all night.”

You didn’t quite understand what happened next. 

One minute he was there, and the next he just...wasn’t. All trace of him was gone from the couch, from the living room, and if it wasn’t for the faint thud and “oomph!” you heard from upstairs in his room, you would’ve thought he had just evaporated or something. 

So that’s what he meant by shortcut that other time. 

Yeah no fuck that. 

You let out a small tired laugh, shaking your head slowly. You suddenly felt light, bubbly, as if Sans’ embarrassment had awakened some kind of...happiness deep inside you. 

You hadn’t felt like this in a long time. 

Snorting a little to yourself, you made to stand up. You should probably go and apologise for teasing him, even if his reactions had been the best-

_“Does his discomfort amuse you that much, human?”_

The voice made your entire body lock in place, and your head shot up, meeting the lifeless black eyes of...something. Something terrifying. Something from a nightmare. 

Your nightmare. 

“--SA-” you began to scream, but before you could finish, your world went completely black.


	7. THE ONE WHERE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’VE JUST HAD THE BEST AND YET THE WORST FUCK OF YOUR ENTIRE LIFE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **THIS CHAPTER HAS MENTIONS OF PREVIOUS SELF-HARM, SO IF THAT KIND OF THING TRIGGERS YOU, THEN I'D ADVISE YOU TO STOP READING.**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> It's super muggy where I live right now I feel like I'm gonna die help.
> 
> I just want to say, thank you for your kind words regarding my personal problems. Losing a family member - especially someone who you're particularly close to - is very hard. I had the funeral to go to on Wednesday, and it was really upsetting, but at the same time, it was a beautiful send off for such a special person. 
> 
> Thank you, Grandad, for being in my life. I love you. 
> 
> Anyway, I have an announcement. Since I've had some people ask me about tumblr, I figured I'd link you to some of my blogs.
> 
> dawn-stone-slifer.tumblr.com is the blog I've recently made for writing only, so if you have questions regarding Relinquish, or any writing in general, feel free to message me on there!
> 
> cinnamon-roll-ragna.tumblr.com is my personal blog - I do a bit of voice acting, so that's where most of my work regarding that goes - so if you just want to chat, then you can message me on there! I'm also thinking of starting up voice acting commissions in the near future, so if you want something voiced over, then get in touch.
> 
> I can't thank you guys enough for sticking with me. I really appreciate all the messages I receive. You guys are great. Thank you.

You felt...weird. 

Not in any good or bad way, so to speak. Just...weird. 

Indescribable. 

You...felt like something was missing. Like you’d just woken up from a long dream and were trying to recall all of it’s events. 

...You were laying on something soft. 

Not the couch. 

Oh. 

Your eyes snapped open at the sudden realisation that you were not where you should be, and you jolted upwards, gasping for breath as panic took over. 

Your eyes darted around as you tried to determine where you were, quickly stopping as you realised it was too dark to see anything. 

You didn’t know where you were. _Fuck,_ you didn’t know where you were. Your mouth opened, and you began to call out. 

“S-Sa--”

“i’m here.”

You let out a small yelp as Sans’ voice greeted you from the other side of the room, followed by a shuffling noise as he moved closer. You could faintly see his silhouette in the darkness, and you gulped down your fear. 

“I...w-where...?”

“you’re in my room. thought you could use a nap on a real mattress.”

You looked down, your hands feeling the cushiony material underneath you gently. 

Well, it was certainly better than the couch, you’d give him that. 

“R-Right...well...thank you...I guess...wait, how did you get me up here?”

“teleported you.”

Your stomach flipped at the idea of Sans doing that disappearing act he’d done earlier on you, and you gulped hard. 

“Oh...of course...”

You lifted a hand to your face, slowing beginning to rub your eyes. You still couldn’t shake that odd feeling that you were missing something. 

“Hey, Sans...” you began, taking you hand away from your face to look in his direction, “...what happened?”

“whaddaya mean, what happened?”

“I...don’t know,” you answered truthfully, “I just...feel like something happened to me...I don’t really remember anything, though...”

You heard Sans sigh, before he moved closer. You watched as his form slumped down on the edge of his mattress, the material dipping under his weight. 

“first...how much do you know about...the void?”

His words echoed in your head. 

The Void. 

You didn’t know why, but those words made your body go completely cold. 

You didn’t like this feeling. You didn’t like this at all. 

You winced as a sudden pain shot through your skull, and you doubled over, gripping at your head as a strange fuzzy noise echoed in your mind. It sounded like static from a radio, turned up on it’s highest volume. It was making your ears hurt. 

You flinched as you felt smooth fingers touch your hands, pulling them away from your face. 

“sorry. i won’t mention it. forgot it’s not really something normal people talk about. or even know about, at that.”

“W-Wha--” you cut yourself off as a particularly sharp pain throbbed through your brain, and you let out a small whimper of a cry. 

“it’s okay. just...try to stop thinking about it. it’ll make things easier. trust me...here, lemme help...”

You inhaled shakily as you felt a wave of something cool and soothing hit you, and you slumped a little, your body slouching forwards into San’s hands. 

“...you okay?”

“Mmhmm...” you managed to mumble out. 

You weren’t gonna lie, it felt as if you’d just been shot with a tranquillizer. That drowsy feeling was kinda off-putting, but not entirely unwelcome. 

“...What happened to me, Sans?” 

Your voice was quiet, but not worried, you realised. Another wave of that cool, soothing feeling washed over you, and you sighed softly. You didn’t have the energy to be worried right now. 

“...you were...pulled,” Sans began, “not really sure how you managed it, but you were getting pulled...didn’t even realise until you started screaming. and then i felt that place and...i got you outta there, though, don’t worry. you weren’t in there for even a second...but...you don’t remember? like, any of it at all?”

His words only served to confuse you more. You shook your head slowly, nuzzling against his sternum with your nose as you did so. The bone felt...cool. Like that washing feeling that was taking over you. 

It felt nice. 

“My head’s fuzzy...” you murmured against him, “can’t think straight...”

“probably my doing. my magic kinda does that. i’ll just-”

“Don’t stop.”

“huh?”

“Don’t...don’t stop,” you sighed, nuzzling closer against the skeleton, your eyes already drooping, “it...it doesn’t hurt when you do that...don’t stop...please...”

“...ok, _____.”

Those were the last words you heard, before your body slipped into unconsciousness once again.

 

You were well aware of the fact that you were incapable of moving, even before you opened your eyes. 

And not in the weird kind of fucked up sexual way, either. Your mind had already gone to that place, but you were pretty sure you could still move and you weren’t bound in some weird bondage karma sutra position. 

You weren’t gonna lie though; your body felt as if it had just had the best fuck of it’s entire life. Your limbs felt like both jelly and lead at the same time, (how that was possible, you had no idea) and your head was spinning. 

Okay, scratch that, you were feeling pretty horrible. 

Maybe _not_ the greatest fuck of your life, then. 

You allowed your eyes to flutter open, and you blinked away the tiredness, glancing around you. 

You were wrapped up in a bundle of blankets, your body cocooned safely inside them, save for your injured foot, which was sitting quite snugly outside of your little comfort zone. You could feel the softness of a pillow beneath your head, and the somewhat comfortable mattress beneath your tired body. 

Sans. 

The memories came flooding back, and you attempted to sit up, wanting to look for the skeleton. You winced as the dizzy feeling in your head increased tenfold, and you slumped back down, clutching at your aching skull, groaning out a curse. 

“need help there?”

You flinched as you heard San’s deep tone, before glancing over at him. 

He sat on the edge of the bottom of his mattress - had he been there from the start? - smirking at you softly under the light from his window. 

“hey. earth to the human. you still alive?”

You shook your head, mumbling out a few choice curse words at him, before snuggling into the pillow and closing your eyes. 

“hey, don’t fall back asleep. i’ve been waiting forever for you to come to. i need your help with something.”

“My help...?” you murmured, lifting your head a little as you reopened your eyes to stare at him, “with what...?”

“get up. i’ll tell ya when we’re on the move.”

That got your attention. 

“...We’re going outside?”

“yeah. got some business round snowdin today.”

“...And you’re letting me tag along? What happened to me being on house arrest until my foot’s better?”

“it’s healing,” he responded quickly, “i think we can risk an hour or two out on it today.”

“...But, what about Undyne?” you countered weakly. 

“she won’t even know you exist. i’ll make sure of it.”

You went silent, staring at the mattress as you pondered. 

“hey, don’t worry, kid. i’ll keep an eye socket out for ya. no one’s gonna attack you while you’re with me...and, i think you need the fresh air. it’ll do ya some good. trust me.”

"But...I..."

You weren't going to win this. You could already tell but the look Sans was giving you.

"...Alright, fine. An hour. But if you annoy me I'll hobble my way back here."

 

"...Clothes?"

"that's what i said."

You stared at Sans, a frown settling on your face.

"...What's wrong with the clothes I have now?" You asked, motioning to yourself. Sans shrugged in response, choosing to leaf through a rail of warm-looking sweaters. 

"you've been wearing the same outfit for nearly a week now. thought you could use some new stuff."

"...This is what you dragged me out of bed for...?" You let out a grumble as he held out a couple of sweaters for you to take.

"just humour me, would’ya? 

His tone left no room for argument. With a grumble, you took the clothes from him, quickly getting ushered into the changing room at the back of the small store. The rabbit lady manning the front desk gave you a sympathetic look as you closed the curtain, which only fuelled your bad mood even more. 

Why had Sans been so insistent about you coming with him today? It didn't make any sense. No matter what way you looked at it, the urgency in his voice and the situation you were graced with right now just didn't add up. Didn't click together. 

_"Isn't it obvious? You're his new toy."_

The voice that echoed in the back of your head made you cringe. Why did it sound so familiar?

_"He's fascinated by you. The way your human body moves and breaks. How your skin bruises and how your blood clots. He's enraptured."_

The air around you, once comfy and warm, turned cold. You shuddered, looking at yourself in the mirror that stood opposite you. 

_"...He wants nothing more than to see more of that. More of your pain. More bruises. More scars. He wants to break you."_

You looked down at your uncovered arms, staring blankly at the scars that littered them. 

_"It would be so easy to just...erase yourself, wouldn't it? Take away all of that pain and just...stop...I could help you, if you--"_

"hey, _____. you done yet?"

As soon as San's words met your ears, the cold feeling went. You blinked and shook your head, staring at yourself in the mirror in confusion. 

What...had you just been doing?

 

"you're spacing out an awful lot today. you sure you feelin' alright?"

You sighed, shaking your head at the skeleton as you walked. You'd managed to pick out a couple of comfy sweaters, some thermal pants, and a pair of hiking boots on your trip, and although you were more than happy with paying, Sans insisted that he paid instead. His excuse was that you'd helped out around the house and kept his brother company, and while that didn't seem like the best reason to fork out gold for you, you didn't have the energy to argue with him. 

"I'm fine. Stop worrying so much," you replied, "I'm just...tired, I guess."

"you guess?"

"Yeah. I guess."

Sans went quiet for a moment, pondering your words as you walked along. He'd mentioned something about more errands, and although you were pretty tired, you'd given in and agreed to tagging along. 

It wasn't that bad. Not really. Sans was the kind of guy who you got on with easily. Small talk between the two of you came naturally, and despite the fact that you'd only known the skeleton for six days, it felt like so much longer. 

You'd be more than happy to spend a little bit longer with him and Papyrus. 

"...c'mon. over here. i wanna introduce you to somebody."

You felt Sans grab your shirt and tug gently, urging you over to your next stop. You gave him a confused look, before going along with it; dragging yourself with him to a strange cabin-looking building. 

"in here," he motioned, pushing the door open for you as you walked up the porch steps.

You were greeted with a slam of warmth that honestly startled you a little. You turned to Sans as he closed the door, and his grin widened in response to your confusion. 

"don't worry, it's just grillby. he's, uh...pretty hot."

You raised an eyebrow at his words, before glancing around you.

It was a bar, by the looks of it. Although the place was empty. 

"...Is this place even open right now?" You asked him as he began to walk towards the bar counter, his hands in his pockets. 

"oh yeah, everyone’s just busy right now. the dogs are out on patrol, the other guys...well, they're doing stuff. which means it's just you, me, and good ol' grillbz."

"Good ol' Grillbz, huh?" You echoed, looking around, "don't tell me this is where you disappear to every night when Papyrus starts cooking?"

"...heh."

"...You traitorous bastard."

"hey now, no need for that kind of language. if grillby hears ya, he’ll kick you out...speak of the devil...!"

Sans planted himself on a bar stool, ushering you up next to him just as the back door opened. Another shot of hot air was sent your way, and you winced a little as it made your eyes sting. 

You looked up towards the other monster who'd joined you.

And immediately pursed your lips.

Suddenly the hot line Sans had chosen before made perfect sense.

"...I see what you mean," you leant down near Sans skull, speaking in a hushed tone, "he is pretty hot..."

Sans chuckled.

"The hottest. Trust me when I say, no one can hold a _candle_ to him!"

You couldn't stop the snicker that left your mouth.

"God dammit, Sans."

"eh, you love it really."

"............Am I interrupting something?"

The deep gravelly voice took you off guard, and you shot up, feeling your cheeks heat up in embarrassment.

"O-oh, no!" You stammered, your eyes narrowing when you heard Sans chuckling behind you.

"leave the kid alone, grillby. she's no trouble. in fact, this is who i wanted to introduce you to. this is _____. _____, this is grillbz. he's an old friend of mine."

"..............Pleasure to finally meet you. Sans has told me a lot about you."

"L-Likewise," you answered, "although he's never really mentioned you before...but it's nice to finally meet you!"

Grillby nodded in response, before turning to Sans.

"............What'll it be?"

"two burgers with fries, grillby. and ketchup." 

"Sans, you really don't have to get me anything, I'm fine," you counter, watching as Grillby wandered back into the back room.

"gotta keep you fed. you're never gonna heal if you don't eat properly. besides, i figured you could use a change from pap's cooking."

You opened your mouth to argue, but after seeing the look Sans shot as you, you simply slouched in your seat, grumbling to yourself.

"...take better care of yourself, kid."

"Huh?"

"...nothin'."

You went to question Sans about what he'd mumbled at you, but when a tinge of black moved out of the corner of your eye, you froze and your skin began to crawl. 

You were being watched.

You were being watched.

_You were being watched._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> damn son that's pretty creepy.


	8. THE ONE WHERE YOU'RE FINE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS GRAPHIC SCENES AND MENTIONS OF SELF-HARM. in other words I 'corpse party'ed it up in here. IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU COULD BE TRIGGERED BY THESE THINGS, THEN I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU STOP READING.**
> 
>  
> 
> Probably a bad time to mention, but I'm a slut for Corpse Party AU's and making people suffer in my writing. 
> 
> Someone give me a Corpse Party/Undertale crossover now pls thank. I wanna suffer.
> 
> You can probably tell, but I'm running on fumes right now; I actually stayed up all night trying to work on various writing projects and I've kinda puffed myself out. 
> 
> Imma post this then go pass out for a few days. Or go walk around my neighbourhood playing Pokemon Go. I need to keep my title as Gym Leader, after all. So sleep can wait. 
> 
> Thanks for reading, guys.
> 
> ~Dawn~

"...Okay, I'll admit; that food was pretty amazing," you let out a happy sigh as you wandered, Sans by your side.

"told ya it would make a nice change from pap's cooking," Sans shrugged, before patting his non-existent stomach, "grillbz knows how to make a good meal..."

"Papyrus is getting there," you countered lightly, lifting your arms up over your head and stretching, "it'll take a little while, but he'll be a great cook someday. Practise makes perfect."

"hmm..."

"What, you don't believe me?"

Sans' smirk grew. 

"oh no, i believe you. just never thought...nah, doesn't matter."

You gave him a questioning look, before putting his words to the back of your mind. You nudged the skeleton with your shoulder a little, offering him a smile.

"Thanks, Sans."

"what for?"

"For taking me out today. For bugging me into coming with you. For buying me clothes and food, even when I said I'd pay for them. For...everything. Thank you, Sans."

The smile on your face was genuine as you looked up towards the top of the caverns, watching as snow began to flitter down. You still weren't sure how it worked, but you'd gotten past the point of trying to explain it to yourself. Magic was just an easy answer now.

"g-geez, kid. quit talkin' like that. makes it sound like you're gonna leave us," Sans let out a chuckle, although you didn't miss the stammer in his voice. 

"...I know why you did it, Sans," you murmured, more to yourself than to him, "my friend used to do it all the time on the surface. They'd make me forget how crap everything was, even if only for a little while. They'd make me smile and laugh, when I thought it was impossible..."

"they sound like a great friend."

"They were," you looked down, staring at him with a grin, "and so are you. You're funny and smart, and always know what to say...thank you..."

You looked off to the side, suddenly feeling more than a little embarrassed.

"C-c'mon! Let's get out of the snow!" You stuttered out, beginning to walk ahead of the quiet skeleton. 

"...sure thing, kid. you're welcome."

 

"SANS! HUMAN! YOU'RE BACK!"

You couldn't help but laugh as Papyrus came barrelling into the living room, a cheerful look on his face.

"Hey, Papyrus. You seem happy."

"OF COURSE! I HAD A FULL DAYS WORK AND THEN TRAINING WITH UNDYNE! THAT ALWAYS PUTS ME IN A GOOD MOOD!"

"it sure does, bro," Sans added, closing the door behind him and allowing the warm air to settle around you.

"AND I'M GLAD TO SEE THAT YOU'RE WALKING AROUND A LITTLE, HUMAN! PRETTY SOON, I’LL BE ABLE TO TAKE YOU TO MEET UNDYNE! SHE’LL BE SO PROUD OF ME FOR CAPTURING YOU!"

At the mention of Undyne, your body froze. You were just starting to enjoy yourself. You sure as hell didn't want this to be over yet.

Sans seemed to sense your distress and stepped in, holding his bony arms up in a shrug as he shook his head.

"uh, i don't know about that, paps. _____'s still not up to a lot right now. s'been a long day, y'know? and look; her ankle still hasn't fully healed. need to make sure she’s in tip top condition for meeting undyne, right? why not wait a couple more weeks, yeah? just...keep undyne out of the loop a little bit longer. can't have the captain of the royal guard getting too excited now, can we?"

Papyrus straightened his posture, placing a gloved hand on his jaw as he thought. 

"HMM...YOU MAKE A GOOD POINT...THE HUMAN REALLY SHOULD BE HEALED FULLY BEFORE MEETING UNDYNE. THAT WAY WHEN SHE SUPLEXES YOU SHE WONT BREAK YOUR BONES. ALSO, REGARDING THAT, HUMAN; YOU SHOULD REALLY DRINK MORE MILK! STRONG BONES MAKE FOR A HAPPY SKELETON, YOU KNOW! I FIGURED THE SAME WOULD APPLY TO YOU, TOO, SINCE MILK IS NICE AND YOU ARE NICE, TOO!" 

"R-right, Pap. Thank you..."

Well, looks like you'd avoided becoming fish food for a couple of weeks longer. You sent Sans a look of thanks, which he returned with a shrug and a wink. 

"I'LL GO FETCH YOU SOME MILK NOW! OOH! MAYBE I COULD DO THAT THING YOU TAUGHT ME AND HEAT IT UP FOR YOU, TOO! I'M SURE YOU MUST BE COLD!"

"...Sure," you murmured, wincing as Papyrus sped back into the kitchen, "but don't forget to keep the heat low, Papyrus! I don't want you burning down the kitchen!" 

Sans chuckled at your words, before strolling past you, pausing to hand you the bag of clothes he'd purchased for you earlier.

"go change. paps’ll love to see you in a new outfit. just leave your dirty clothes by the door when you've finished."

You nodded, a content smile settling on your face. You could really do with a quick clean up, anyway. 

You made your way to the bathroom - you'd figured out that the skeleton’s didn't exactly need one since, y'know, no bladders, but Papyrus adored showers and it just so happened that when they moved in, the house came with a bathroom tucked away under the staircase - closing the door behind you quietly. 

You inhaled deeply, the smile refusing to leave your face as you set the bag of clothes by the door. Today had been a good day for you, thanks to Sans. You’d have to start giving the small skeleton more credit; he was a lot more observant than he let on. He'd figured out your shitty mood before you'd even regained full consciousness this morning. 

He had to have previous experience. 

You sighed, before shrugging off your dirty sweater; dropping it on the ground as you reached for the button on your jeans. 

You let the fabric pool at your feet, being careful to pull your injured ankle out of them slowly. 

Speaking of, it wasn't hurting all that much today. You'd been limping on it a little at the start of the day, but as you'd made your way around Snowdin, you seemed to be able to put more pressure on it. Maybe walking on it was doing it some good?

You left your clothes where they were, choosing to move to the sink and turn on the warm tap, splashing your face with water. It was nice, refreshing. It made you feel clean.

You quickly turned off the tap, reaching for the towel as you glanced up into the mirror that hung in front of the sink.

The breath hitched in your throat.

Your blood ran cold.

And your eyes locked on two empty sockets. 

 

"...Who are you?" 

You didn't know when you regained the ability to speak. You were still locked in place; still frozen in this strange...man’s gaze. He cocked his head to the side, silent for now.

"Who are you?" You tried again, this time a little louder. Your skin was developing goosebumps, you could feel it. 

_"...What a disgusting sight."_

His voice sent a jolt through you that shook you to your very core. 

You suddenly felt dread pool in your gut.

_"What a pathetic excuse for a human. You've marked yourself so much there's not a single pure piece of you left."_

The man lifted a bony hand, pointing at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes followed him, gulping down your disgust at what he was referring to.

The marks that littered your arms, stomach and upper thighs were your hell. They served as a constant reminder that you were weak, worthless. 

You didn't want to look at them.

But you couldn't look away.

He wouldn't let you.

_"What kind of human deserves to live after doing that to themselves? What kind of human deserves to keep their SOUL after what you've done to it?"_

You felt a sharp pain in your ribs, and your eyes darted down to see your SOUL floating in front of your chest.

It looked...different from the last time you saw it. The cracks were still there, and it still looked pale and sickly, but...it seemed...brighter. Like it was almost glowing. 

Although when you felt a shiver run down your spine, that glow dimmed.

_"No one will be surprised when your SOUL finally gives up. It’s being held together by threads now as it is; all it would take is one...push."_

You let out a strangled whimper as the man's hands reached out to touch the faded pink heart in front of you, his bony fingers twitching, glitching...

You gritted your teeth, trying to move your arms. They felt like lead, dangling by your sides. 

_"Still fighting? You have more DETERMINATION than I thought..."_

You felt the breath leave you in a sharp exhale as your SOUL re-entered your body, and you sagged forwards, the movement in your arms returning as you leaned against the sink, gasping for breath. 

_"...For now, I'll leave you with this."_

You barely had time to react as something black and sticky wrapped around your torso and squeezed, dragging the breath out of you. Panic coursed through your veins, and your eyes went wide as another... tendril wriggled in front of you, dangerously close to your face.

_"Don't forget about us. This is your first and final warning."_

And with that, the tendril of what you guessed was magic - you could feel the buzz in the air - curved downwards, the tip of it becoming sharp and deadly. 

And it sliced.

You'd never felt so much pain in your entire life. At once the magic was gone, the man was gone. But that cold feeling remained, made you feel like ice. 

But your arm. Oh god, your arm was on _fire._

You opened your mouth to scream, to cry, to call for help. But the words were scrambled in your head. You couldn't think. You couldn't speak. 

You looked at your arm.

It hurt. It hurt it hurt it hurt-

"_____? everything okay in there?"

Sans. 

_Sans._

"S...Sa..." You whispered out, sinking to the floor as the pain began to take over. You wanted to die. _Oh god,_ you wanted to die...

"_____? buddy? c’mon, this ain't funny. open the door."

You could faintly hear Sans turning the handle of the bathroom door, trying to push it open.

"Sa...ns..." You tried again. Your voice felt hoarse, and it burned when you spoke. 

"...San...s...he...lp..."

You weren't really sure what happened in those next few moments. 

You registered the feeling of magic buzzing and fizzing, and of a voice - Papyrus, maybe? - yelling out. 

A sharp gust of wind hit you with force, and an ear-splitting screech met your ears. 

It hurt. Everything hurt.

Moments later, you felt hands on your face. Your eyelids were lifted open - you hadn't even realised you'd closed them - and there was Sans. 

You'd never seen him look so terrified. 

His right eye-socket was pitch black, and his left was devoid of its usual white pinprick; instead replaced by a bright blue eye. 

He was speaking to you, yelling at you, but you couldn't make out most of the words. His words were slurring together, and it felt like you were underwater.

"...stay with me...okay?!"

He sounded so panicked. It didn't sound right. 

"--HU...NS, WHAT DID YOU...?"

"pap, take __...don't touch their a..."

"B-BROTH...--"

"just do...!"

With that, Sans’ hands disappeared from your face. You made an attempt to keep your eyes open, but it was too difficult. It hurt too much.

You felt yourself being lifted up, and your head rested against something hard and warm.

"IT’S OKAY, HUMAN. I’VE GOT YOU."

Papyrus. You wanted to open your eyes, to tell him not to worry, but you couldn't. 

There was a softness beneath you now, cradling your head and keeping you somewhat upright. Your head slouched forward, but Papyrus pulled it back gently, his gloved hand moving your hair out of your face.

"...SANS!"

You felt that fizzle of magic again, and moments later, those bony fingers were back against your face. 

"bro, i need you...her still, alright?"

Their voices were muffled again. God, you hated this...

"...sorry about this, _____. this is gonna hurt. but it's gotta be done."

You managed to open your eyes a little, your blurry vision taking in the scene before you. Papyrus was holding your injured arm out against the couch, while Sans stood above you, with a pair of what looked like... tweezers in his hand.

Your arm was oozing black. The cut was bubbling and oozing the black magic from before. Oh god, what-

Your eyes snapped open as Sans plunged the tweezers straight into the black ooze, straight into your injured arm. 

Your voice returned. 

And you shrieked. 

Your body spasmed as a fresh wave of pain crashed over you, even more intense than before. You began to thrash, kicking out and desperately trying to tug your arm away. 

"SANS, YOU’RE HURTING HER!"

"keep her _still_ , pap!"

The grip on your arm tightened, and you instinctively reached with your other arm to push Sans away from you.

A flash of blue. 

And suddenly your entire body felt like lead. 

"please...keep still, okay? i’m going as fast as i can..."

You let out a sob in response, weakly moving your arms and legs in a last-ditch attempt to push him off of you. 

"S...Sa--"

"i know, sweetie. i know it hurts. just a little longer."

He sounded tortured. Your glazed over eyes met with his single blue one, and in that moment, you could see your pain reflected right back at you. 

You wanted to die. 

 

Sans pulled back with a start, and the cold feeling that had wrapped itself around your body went with him. You inhaled sharply, letting out a sob of relief which quickly morphed into a cry as fresh pain assaulted you. 

Your body sagged forwards, quickly getting caught and lifted back up by warm hands. 

"...BROTHER, WHAT IS THAT?"

Your SOUL throbbed weakly, stuttering a little. You could feel it inside your chest. 

"...it’s okay, _____...you’re gonna be fine now..."

You felt tired. So, so tired...

"..._____?"

Another stutter. Your SOUL was pressing against your body, trying to escape. 

"...oh no."

You felt a tug, and the feeling of your SOUL being thrown out into the open caused you to twitch. 

"SANS! WHAT’S HAPPENING TO--"

"oh no. oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!"

Bony fingers pressed into your SOUL and pushed, causing you to wheeze out a whimper. It hurt. _It hurt..._

"don't you dare, _____! stay with me!"

"HUMAN! SANS, HER SOUL, IT’S--"

"it’s not gonna shatter!"

Sans was hyperventilating. His fingers pressed harder against you, and you twitched again, your teeth biting down hard on your tongue. 

You wanted to die. Why couldn't they just let you die...?

"...no. not gonna let you. not you, too."

A shot of coldness washed over you, before your body finally gave out, and you fell into unconsciousness...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dang sans y u have to stab her like dat couldn't u have at least asked first geez what an asshole.


	9. THE ONE WHERE YOU PROBABLY SORTA NEED A HUG

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy. Ohhhhhh boy that last chapter. That was some intense shit, huh?
> 
> I mean what's a little angst without someone nearly dying, am I right?
> 
> I'm currently on a high. Which is weird since when I woke up this morning I was super low. But I've had a talk to one of my good friends about my future, and now I feel super pumped!
> 
> So please, take this chapter before I pass out from over excitement. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

"...c'mon, _____...please..."

The muffled voice that met your ears was the first thing you heard as you came to.

That, and the terrifyingly loud ringing. 

It was like someone had been smashing pots and pans right next to you and you were only just beginning to feel the after effects of it.

"..._____?"

That voice again. They sounded hopeful, almost desperate as they called your name.

You twitched, before a croaky moan left your lips.

You opened your eyes. 

And were greeted with a face full of skeleton.

You cringed back quickly into the pillows, hissing out as your chest throbbed in discomfort. Okay, so making any sudden movements was a no-go for now.

"S-Sans...?" You croaked out, wincing as your throat ached in protest. The skeleton in question - the same one who'd been inches away from your face moments ago - sat back, the white pinpricks of his eyes never leaving your face. The grimace that had been on his face (the look didn't suit him; you'd have to tell him that later) morphed into possibly the biggest grin you'd ever seen.

"...you're okay. you're really okay."

"...Yeah?" You whispered, having to settle with the quiet tone for now, "why wouldn't I--"

You felt a slight throb in your left arm, and suddenly it all came flooding back. 

The pain. The shadow in the mirror. The black tendril of magic slicing along one of your scars. The utter terror as Papyrus held you down and Sans plunged those tweezers into you. The way your SOUL hurt after. The panic in Sans’ voice, just before you passed out.

You remembered it all.

You threw your hand across your mouth, shooting up into a sitting position as you felt the bile rise in your throat. A sharp pain shot through your chest, which only seemed to fuel your nausea. 

Sans’ hands pulled your own away from your mouth, and placed a small trash can in front of you.

"let it out," he murmured softly, "let it out if you need to."

And you did. 

Sans’ presence was...oddly comforting, as you sat there, emptying your stomach. His hands never left you; he kept pulling stray strands of hair out of your face, whilst his other hand patted and rubbed your back soothingly. 

It was...nice.

The sickness slowly passed, and after a while of dry-heaving, you slumped against the trash can, letting out a shudder and a shaky groan. 

"...feelin’ a little better?" Sans’ voice spoke up through your discomfort, "you're lookin’ as pale as me right now. can i get ya anything?"

"W-water..." You whispered, and he nodded. He blipped away from you, and moments later, he was back, a full glass of water in hand. 

You took it from him and downed half the glass immediately; the cold water was a god-send in your books.

"someone’s thirsty." You could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Yeah? You try throwing up everything you've eaten the past few hours. Pretty sure you'd want to down a couple of glasses, too."

"nice to see you got that snarky sense of humour back," he patted your head gently, "missed hearin’ that."

"...How long was I out?" 

"it's been about 12 hours. yeah, you were...out of it." Sans turned to you, the grin on his face gone. "speakin’ of, we really need to talk about that."

You could already feel the hairs on the back of your neck standing on end. 

"...am i your friend?"

That made you freeze. You'd been expecting the 'what, why, and how?' set of questions. 

"Of course you are, Sans." 

"then why don't you trust me?"

You opened your mouth to argue, but quickly closed it again. He noticed. 

"i’m not blind, _____. i see the way you carry yourself. you don't want to get close, attached. and when you do, you hate it. you’re constantly looking for ways to leave. why?" He paused, catching your eye, "what happened up there that was so bad you resulted to...this?"

It took a moment for you to realise he was talking about before you fell. You bit your lip, looking away.

"...m’sorry."

"...Huh?" You couldn't help but answer him.

"...s’none of my business. you...you had your reasons for comin’ here, i’m sure. but..." He inhaled deeply, before continuing, "if you really wanna lie to me that badly...you gotta stop laying your emotions out on a silver platter for me."

"...What are you talking about?" 

Sans sighed, before reaching forward with his hand and pulling your SOUL from your chest.

Your eyes widened at the changes your little broken SOUL had.

 

It was split. The heart had completely split down the middle, and the hairline cracks along the rest of its’ surface were growing. In fact, the only thing that seemed to be keeping the two halves together was a thin thread of...blue that ran down the middle. Confused and a little worried, you reached out to touch it.

In response to your curiosity, the blue thread began to glow; its’ fluorescent shine taking over your entire SOUL for a moment. Your body was bathed in a calming cool feeling, and you couldn't help but sigh a little as you felt your body relax.

"...What happened to it?" The words left your mouth before you could stop them.

"...it was gonna shatter," Sans replied slowly, "after pulling that...stuff outta your arm, your soul practically collapsed under the pressure...i wasn't gonna let that happen. so i..." He paused, the pinpricks of light in his eye sockets watching you carefully, "...i pushed a bit of my magic into it...y'know, to heal the cracks. i’m...kinda using my magic as a bandage for your soul right now..."

"...Why?"

Your voice was bitter as you took the chance to look away, choosing instead to stare at the wall to your left.

"because you're important to us. you're our friend. you're special, and i wasn't just gonna let you die." 

"No offence, but we've known each other for a week. You know _nothing_ about me," you snapped back, unable to stop the negativity from leaving you, "so stop trying to act like I'm not irreplaceable."

"uh, _no offence, buddy,_ but i’m a pretty good judge of character. trust me, a week is all i need to find out if we’re compatible. you really think i’d be riskin’ my bony ass for you if we weren't? you think i’d be lettin’ papyrus risk his friendship with undyne if i wasn't sure?"

You caught a hint of animosity in his tone, and you closed your eyes, suddenly feeling ashamed. 

"...you’re a good person, _____. kind. thoughtful. i’ve seen the way you act; it’s second nature to you. you treat everyone kindly, but you never expect it in return. it’s like you’re just...expecting people to push you aside and hate you."

You felt his hand on your arm, tracing the fading scars there softly.

"i don't get all of the stuff you do...don't think i ever will. but you need to know that your life is precious. your soul is precious. you shouldn't just throw that away."

"...My SOUL is broken," you whispered, your eyes opening to stare at him blankly. 

His hand met your own and he squeezed gently.

"not forever. i--we can mend it. together."

The dam holding your emotions in broke.

His words had hit you hard. 

Not once. Not once had anyone ever been this caring to you. Not your parents, your friends. No one. 

You felt the tears sliding down your face and you were powerless to stop them. Before you had the chance to wipe your eyes, you felt yourself being pulled into a hug. 

The ridges of Sans’ bones pressed into you, but you didn't care.

He was comfort. He was familiar.

He was your lifeline.

And so you clung to him and wept. Wept for your past and everything that had driven you to this. Wept for your weakness in this very moment. And wept in fear for what awaited you in the future.

And the entire time, Sans never let go of you.

 

You hadn't cried that hard in a long time. 

That was the thought that kept popping back into your head as you sat on the couch, nestled between Sans and Papyrus snugly and watching TV. 

Okay, so, you’d never exactly been very vocal when it came to your feelings. You always felt like you were going to be judged if you spoke your mind and shared what you felt, so you just...didn't. The only time you had was when your best friend had forced it out of you.

They were stubborn. But talking to them did help.

But still. You'd never cried that hard in front of them. 

You winced a little as your chest throbbed in discomfort, and you placed a hand against it, trying to push the feeling away. It felt like a serious case of heartburn, but you guessed it wasn't that at all.

"...still hurtin'?"

Your eyes glanced towards Sans who was staring at the TV in front of him. How he had known that was beyond you, but you'd figured at this point, you couldn't exactly hide anything from him.

You felt Papyrus wriggle a little, turning to look at you.

"Are You _Still_ Hurting, Human?" His voice was the quietest you'd ever heard it; Sans had talked to him after your little...crying session and explained that you needed quiet.

Well, he wasn't quiet, but he was trying his hardest. The thought was there, at least.

"Oh...yeah...a little..." You murmured, rubbing your skin a little in an attempt to dissipate the pain.

"hang on. lemme just..." Sans closed his eye sockets for a moment, and then you felt a wave of coolness wash through your chest. It chilled you nicely, and you hummed in response.

"Thank you..." You sighed, snuggling back down into the couch. 

He’d been doing this ever since you’d woken up. The slightest twinge of pain, and he’d do that thing with his magic; that cooling feeling would take over your chest, and you would relax almost instantly. 

"don't mention it, bud. lemme know if you need anything else, okay?" He sent you a grin, and you returned it sleepily.

"Sans, You Should Really Preserve Your Magic More. I Know You're Looking Out For Her, But...You’ll Wear Yourself Out. You’re Not As Adept At Using Magic As I Am, After All."

Papyrus’ voice was laced with concern, and you stared up at him, listening silently as the two brothers talked.

"gotta keep her soul healthy, bro. i’m fine, though, don't worry."

"Sans, Her Soul Will Be Fine. The Worst Has Passed; You Said That Earlier. And You’re _Not_ Fine..."

You sent a side-glance San’s way, quickly coming to the conclusion that yes, Papyrus was right. 

He looked...ill. There were marks appearing under his eyes from what you guessed was exhaustion, and his grin seemed more forced than usual. 

"...Please to go bed, Sans," you murmured softly, "I know you're relaxing now and everything, but you need sleep...you're exhausted. You don't need to worry about me, I'll be fine. I have your awesome brother to take care of me, after all."

"THAT’S RIGHT!" Papyrus boomed out, making you wince, "THE GREAT PAPYRUS WILL MAKE SURE NO HARM COMES TO OUR HUMAN!"

"pap. inside voice."

Papyrus’ words sent a shot of warmth to your SOUL. Our human. That's what he'd said.

You hadn't felt that appreciated and loved in a long time. 

"...paps, please. i’ll be fine!"

At some point you'd zoned out on the skeleton brother’s conversation, so when you heard Sans raise his voice, you couldn't help but flinch.

"You’re On The Verge Of Collapsing, Sans! It’s My Duty As Your Brother To Look After You! And I'm Saying You Need To Go To Bed And Rest," he sighed, shaking his head in disbelief, "Although It Honestly Pains Me To Allow This Lazy Behaviour..."

"for once, pap, i don't feel like sleeping! i’d much rather-"

You'd heard enough. The brother’s were arguing, and as far as you were concerned, you were the cause of it.

"Sans, I'm not asking you. I'm telling you," you said, your voice hard, "go. To bed. Get some rest. Then, when you wake up, you can babysit me to your he-SOUL’s content."

Sans stared at you, the pinpricks of white in his sockets barely visible. And then he was gone. 

"...Stubborn bastard," you muttered sourly, shaking your head before leaning back against the couch. 

"At Least He Listened To You," Papyrus heaved out a sigh, "I Wasn't Getting Through To Him At All."

"Sometimes it takes a bit of tough love to make someone pay attention," you offered in response, which earned you a hum of agreement. 

You took the moment of silence Papyrus gave you to stare at the ceiling. If you focused, you could faintly pick out patterns along the bumpy surface. 

"...Human."

You glanced towards the tall skeleton.

"Hm?"

"Sans Told You About...Your SOUL, Right?"

You nodded slowly, looking down at your chest silently.

"...I Don't Think It's A Good Idea To Tell Undyne About Capturing You Anymore."

He sounded...lost, there wasn't any other way to describe it.

"I Mean...Undyne’s My Friend, And I Don't Want To Lie To Her...But...You're My Friend, Too. And If Undyne Meets You, Then...Well, I Don't Think Your Soul Will Survive That. She Is Very Intimidating, And I Personally Don't Think Your Soul Could Withstand Another Butchering Like The One You got Earlier."

He offered you a small smile; something very un-Papyrus-like, before shuffling a little in his seat.

"You...You Could Stay Here, As Long As You Want To...I Don't Believe Sans Is Willing To Let You Go Easily Now, Considering How His Magic Is Fusing Your Soul Back Together...You Could Live With Us. We Could Have Fun And...You Could Help Me Make Puzzles And...Help Sans Be Happy..."

You could feel your eyes burning with unshed tears. You sniffled a little, wiping your eyes, before reaching out and taking Papyrus’ gloved hand in yours.

"I...I would like that very much, Papyrus. Thank you."

Your brain was screaming at you, telling you how stupid of an idea this was, how they would just end up leaving you in the end, but for the first time in what seemed like forever, you refused to listen.

Your SOUL was practically buzzing from his offer. It felt like someone had injected liquid happiness straight into your veins. 

You could become addicted to this feeling.

"W-Well, That’s Good! Because Human; I Have No Doubt That I...Would Miss You Very Much If You Left..."

You went to let out a coo at his words, but a small sound interrupted you. 

Your eyes widened.

The same sound. 

Papyrus looked at you, confused.

The same sound.

You reached into your back pocket.

The same sound. 

You swiped your finger along the screen of your phone.

The same sound. 

Your blood ran cold. 

**BFF:** _lmao you didn't come home last night. you okay? or did you get drunk again? pmsl_

**BFF:** ______, you're worrying me. it's been two days please answer my calls. i understand if you need some time alone but please let me know you're alright._

**BFF:** _i called your parents. they've filed a missing person’s report. please text me so i can tell them to drop it. please._

**BFF:** ______ please i'm really scared please just call me text me anything just please let me know you're alright and that you haven't done something stupid. i know you're in a dark place right now but this isn't the answer okay it isn't. thing’s will get better okay? we'll figure something out. you don't have to pay rent for a while until you've sorted yourself out you don't have to do anything you don't want to do just. please. don't be dead please don't be dead. please._

**BFF:** _they found your car abandoned near mt. ebott. if this is a joke it isn't fucking funny._

Your SOUL gave a pained throb, and the tears began to slide down your face. You could faintly hear Papyrus asking you what was wrong, but you paid him no attention.

The same sound. Throb.

**BFF:** _i miss you._

_Throb._


	10. THE ONE WHERE YOU REALISE YOU WRITE TOO MUCH: VOLUME 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so here's the deal.
> 
> I've fucked up my hand. I don't really know how I did it, but it's currently in a splint and I can't move my fingers without it hurting like shit. Scratch that, I can't move my index finger at all.
> 
> Writing this up was a struggle. And now my hand is in a lot of pain and I keep getting pins and needles in it. So, for the sake of me resting myself and not damaging my hand further, I'm gonna say there will be NO UPDATE next Friday. If, however, I feel well enough to write in the meantime, I'll post an update letting you all know. 
> 
> Thanks for your support, guys. I really appreciate it.
> 
> Oowie.
> 
> ~Dawn~

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_I had a nightmare last night._

_I only remember bits and pieces._

_Feeling cold. Hands grabbing at me. Voices._

_Then it's blank, like it's been torn from my memory._

_I guess it doesn't really matter._

_It was just a nightmare, after all._

_Date - 06 -03 - 20XX_

_Oh yeah I also woke up in San's bed._

_That was a thing. That happened. Recently._

_I keep asking him what happened to me, but he won't tell me anything. He clammed up after he mentioned the Void._

_The Void._

_Why does it hurt to think about that? Whenever the words enter my head it's like hearing nails on a chalkboard. It just...sets in motion this wave of nausea and I hate it._

_...The Void._

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_Time - 12:37pm_

_I'm gonna start adding the time to these entries since I have a feeling I'm gonna be writing a lot today._

_My head’s still fuzzy._

_Speaking of, how does his magic do that? He managed to knock me out cold with just a little bit of his magic._

_I wonder if I could learn magic?_

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_Time - 12:43pm_

_Sans has just informed me that no, I can't learn magic._

_Party pooper._

_Well, it was worth a shot._

_Magic would've been pretty cool._

_Like some elemental magic or something._

_Sans has also just informed me that the King can use fire magic._

_Interesting._

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_Time - 1:46pm_

_I feel really weird._

_Like, super bubbly._

_And I don't know why._

_The nightmare from last night did...something to me, but...did San’s magic do something as well?_

_I don't know._

_I keep forgetting stuff._

_I keep getting these little spouts of amnesia at random times and then I feel like an idiot because Sans is with me and I can tell he's worried but_

_I feel fine. Better than fine, actually._

_I feel happy._

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_Time - 2:22pm_

_I’m relying on my phone for the time and I don't know if I should, considering there's no signal down here and it keeps making this weird buzzing sound every time I unlock it._

_Technology._

_We’re at Grillby’s. He’s really nice. Kinda quiet to the point of it being awkward, but nice._

_Sans is giving me an odd look._

_Foods here. It looks good._

you always write down every little thing that happens in your day? ;)

_How the fuck did you manage to write that I have literally not moved since I started eating what the actual fuck._

mmmmmmmagic ;D

_...Fuck off with your cutesy emoticons to the other end of the bar, Sans. Let me eat in peace._

_Date - 06 - 03 - 20XX_

_Time - 2:58pm_

_That was, by far, the greatest meal I've had in a long time._

_Or maybe it's monster food. Maybe it's something to do with the ingredients they put in it._

_Well, whatever the case, I feel like I could run. A whole lot._

_And that's pretty serious considering my ankle was broken six days ago._

_Speaking of, it doesn't hurt anymore. And I can move it._

_...The fuck did you put in those burgers, Grillby?_

_Date - 0000000 - XXXXXXXX - 11101700111100011_

_**The seed’s been planted.** _

_**It’s done.** _

__

_**Sorry, Sans.** _

_Date - 07 - 03 - 20XX_

_What the fuck happened to me._

_Like I know what happened I remembered but what the fuck._

_That man. That man did something to me and I don't know what but I felt like I was gonna die._

_My chest hurts really bad every time I think about it._

_Sans won't talk about it. He won't tell me what that thing was that he pulled out of my arm and he won't tell me why it happened._

_He knows. He has to know._

_**He doesn’t.** _

_He does. He just won't tell me. He's keeping secrets._

_**And you’re not?** _

_I'm not saying I'm not. This is serious._

_**Childish.** _

_Shut up._

_Date - 07 - 03 - 20XX_

_I don't remember writing any of this._

_Date - 07 - 03 - 20XX_

_I miss you, too, _BF Name_._

_I didn't really know how badly I missed you until I left._

_I miss our late night talks about anything and everything._

_I miss sitting out on the roof in nothing but our pyjamas when there were thunderstorms._

_I miss binge-watching all those weird shows you got me into, and that I got you into._

_I miss giving you relationship advice, because no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to find the right guy for you and it sucks._

_I miss making pancakes with you from scratch and covering the kitchen in batter mixture._

_I miss sleeping in the same bed as you when one of us couldn't be bothered to make our own._

_I miss going to see your grandma with you and spending the weekend there._

_I miss taking the dogs on long walks with you through the park._

_\------------------------------------------_

_I miss you._

_I'm sorry._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> daaaaaamn gaster 
> 
> baCK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE MIND-BREAKING SHENANIGANS


	11. THE ONE WHERE YOU PLAY THE MONSTER EQUIVALENT OF 20 QUESTIONS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here's an update. I honestly didn't know if I was gonna get this out on time, considering I've been bed-ridden all week with a stomach virus. Not fun.
> 
> Just an announcement, my personal and writing Tumblrs have now been merged into one. I can focus a lot more on what's important now, mainly my voice acting. Speaking of, if you guys have any requests, please send em' through! my url is dawn-stone-slifer. 
> 
> Fun fact: Most of the horrid scenes in this fic, especially ones that concern characters yelling, I like to act out in advance, to make sure it flows and sounds natural. The more you know~
> 
> Thanks for being patient with me, guys. I'm back to my regular schedule.
> 
> ~Dawn~

Time passed.

Things changed. 

Initially, after the...accident and the multiple texts from your best friend, both your mind and SOUL had taken a massive hit. 

You remember how your chest had throbbed, how you felt like you were burning from the inside out, how the tears streamed down your face and the hollow cries left your mouth. 

You remember bony arms wrapping themselves round your trembling frame, soft words spoken into your ear, and magic smoothing along the cracks in your SOUL.

You remember falling asleep to fingers running through your hair.

Three months.

It had been three months since that day.

Things were...well, you weren't really sure what they were exactly. Better? No, not in the slightest. Your brain still told you how much of a terrible person you were practically on a daily basis.

Easier? Maybe. Life in the Underground was certainly simpler than it was up on the surface. 

Although, those times when you had to hide yourself away from Undyne when she stopped by were nerve-wracking, to say the least. 

You'd taken to just...darting into Sans’ room whenever she turned up. As much as you hated feeling trapped, you knew that the small skeleton would keep you safe. 

You hated to admit it, but he'd become your...guardian angel down here in the Underground, so to speak. 

You'd found out pretty quickly that Sans’ SOUL magic - the magic that was keeping it knit together, even after three months - was doing a lot more than just keeping it in one piece.

You’d experienced it about three days after the accident. It had taken a lot of pressing, but the brothers were finally allowing you to stay in the house by yourself again. The two had gone to work that morning, and you’d spent most of the day watching movies. (you'd been surprised at their selection; turns out a lot of human entertainment fell down here, both old and new.) Of course, boredom hit, and with it, the emptiness.

You ended up laying on the floor in front of the TV, staring up at the ceiling with blank eyes. 

As soon as that first intrusive, destructive thought hit, your SOUL had erupted into a frenzy of buzzing and crackling sensations. 

Moments later, Sans was in front of you, on his knees, his eye sockets devoid of light.

He'd pulled you up into his arms without a word, and you ended up crying on his shoulder for a while.

Turns out he could read you before even _you_ could now. 

You didn't know whether to be grateful or insanely irritated, to be honest.

While it was comforting to know Sans would be there for you in your times of need, you weren't particularly fond of him blipping in and out of existence to your SOUL whenever you had a sad thought.

Sure, some were bad, but others you could handle. You'd been doing it long before you’d fallen down here. 

Sans just seemed to think it was one extreme or the other, like there was no grey area in between that you could cope with and, while it was nice he was trying to help, it was starting to bug you. 

 

"_____. SHE’S COMING."

Papyrus’ words snapped you out of your thoughts, and you glanced towards the front door from your spot on the couch, before getting to your feet and stretching. 

You offered Papyrus a gentle smile, to which he returned half-heartedly. You felt your SOUL give a painful twang at his expression; he was trying so hard to keep you hidden from Undyne, but you knew he hated it. 

He was innocent. Sweet. Kind. 

You wished you could guarantee him that Undyne wouldn't kill you, that you could be friends like he wanted you to be.

But you knew better. 

You climbed the stairs swiftly, making your way to Sans’ door and knocking on it lightly.

"...mmyeah?"

"Sans. Code Undyne. Let me in."

"what's the mmmagic word?"

You rolled your eyes, unimpressed.

"Let me in, fuckstick."

You heard a muted gasp from downstairs, and you winced.

"Sorry, Pap. I'll wash my mouth out with soap after she’s gone."

"THAT SOUNDS UNPLEASANT, BUT IF IT’LL STOP THAT LANGUAGE FROM LEAVING YOUR MOUTH, THEN DO WHAT YOU NEED TO."

You heard Sans chuckle from the other side of the door, before opening it and allowing you to dart inside. 

The door clicked shut behind him, and you heaved a sigh of relief. 

"...fuckstick, huh? that’s a new one."

"I've got a plethora of em’, pal."

He snorted, ruffling your hair gently before motioning for you to follow him. 

This had become...routine, ever since you'd started hiding here with him. Slumping down on his mattress, head propped up against his pillow, him following suit and settling down next to you. 

It was something you were both comfortable with.

Your eyes darted down to your jeans pocket, and you reached into it, pulling out your phone and unlocking it. 

"any luck?"

You shook your head slowly in response.

"No. Not yet. Not a peep. I just...don't get how their texts were able to get through..."

The texts your best friend had sent you months ago still haunted your mind, even now. You could remember each text, each plea off by heart. And it hurt.

"the barrier’s a weird thing. maybe a blip in it’s magic caused a signal to get through or something for a few seconds...i’m guessing no luck with respondin’ to them?"

"All my messages have failed to send, and my calls are instantly dropped. I’d be more successful with a megaphone," you tried to end your words on a joke, but the laughter didn't meet your eyes.

"...okay, enough of that talk. time for our regularly scheduled question time."

You rolled your eyes.

 

This had also become a routine thing, after the fifth or sixth visit to his room. The two of you would sit and ask each other questions about each other. No lies, no tears. Just simple questions and simple answers. 

It was a good way to get to know each other a little bit better.

"...Okay, shoot. You first."

"fine...let’s see..." He paused, placing his chin in his bony hand.

"...dog or cat person?"

You raised an eyebrow at him, before shrugging.

"Both. I've owned dogs before, but cats are cool, too."

"okay, cool. shoulda guessed with the way you were petting greater dog at grillby’s the other day. you looked like you were havin’ a blast."

"He was soft, okay? He keeps his fur clean."

"fair enough. your turn."

"Okay...coffee or tea?"

"pfft. you kiddin’ me? coffee."

"Really? I would've pegged you as more of a sweet tea kind of guy."

He shook his head, his grin widening.

"nah. tea’s nice, but nothing beats pure black coffee."

"...you don't add milk?"

"no. why would i do that?"

He sounded genuinely curious. 

You wrinkled your face up in disgust.

"But...it's so bitter and...gross..."

"dunno if you’ve tried monster coffee, but i can guaran _tea_ that you're way off. monster coffee isn't bitter in the slightest."

You chose to ignore his pun in favour of leaning further into his pillow. 

"i can get ya some, if ya want."

"...I think I'm good. Thanks for the offer, though."

You slipped into a comfortable silence, choosing to glance out of Sans’ window, watching the snow fall in the growing evening. 

How you could clearly see the time of day down here, you had no idea, but you guessed it was down to the same power that allowed it to snow. 

You'd stopped really thinking about it after a month of being underground. 

"...what’s on your mind?"

"...Nothing, really," you sighed, "just wondering how your weather works down here, is all."

Sans snorted, nudging you with his shoulder gently.

"you're stuck underground with a group of monsters that would happily take your soul for a chance to see the sun, and here you are wondering about the fake one," he shook his head, "you amaze me, _____."

"Yeah, well, believe it or not, you guys don't really frighten me anymore. You did to begin with - no offence - but now that I know you, you're actually...really kind. Kinder than most humans."

Your SOUL chose that moment to give a small flutter, and your hand pressed against your chest, trying to ease the ache.

"...heh. sorry. my bad. that was me."

You glanced up, watching as Sans scratched at the back of his skull.

"What was you? This?" You gestured to the centre of your chest where your SOUL rested, and he nodded. Wait, was it just you, or did he look really nervous...?

"y-yeah. ya just...geez, you know how to embarrass a guy, is all. my magic didn't know what to do with itself for a second there."

It took you a moment to realise what he meant by that.

And when it finally hit you, you couldn't stop the sly smile that lit up your face.

"Can't handle a little compliment, Sansafrass?" You snorted a little, nudging his shoulder. "Cute."

Another flutter deep in your SOUL made you wince a little, but you did your best to hide it from your face. When you thought about it, it didn't really hurt; it just wasn't something you were used to. Your SOUL was still extremely sensitive to handling, and any jolt that ran through it or flutter that caressed it you felt ten-fold. 

You vaguely remembered when you'd tried to cup your SOUL in your hands, a few days after the accident. As soon as your fingers had touched the cracked surface, a jolt of molten hot pain had shot through your body.

You'd ended up in a heap on the floor, your limbs numb from the pain.

This. This wasn't anything like that. It felt like...you didn't really know how to describe it. Like when you have a knot in your muscles and someone just...presses on it and massages it to relieve the stress and get rid of the bigger ache. 

It was painful. But it was a nice pain. Something that made you feel relaxed afterwards.

And it didn't send you to the floor in agony. 

"...you wanna go to grillby’s?"

"Eh. Hungry, but don't really wanna move right now."

You waved a hand at him dismissively, and he chuckled, sitting himself up and stretching. 

"i can always get some to go. don't worry. i’ll be back in a few minutes."

And with that he was gone, blipping out of existence. 

You loved and hated that teleportation ability of his. As handy as it was, you had no doubt he was messing with some force that shouldn't be messed with.

_"You would be correct in thinking so, child."_

Your SOUL turned cold at the voice that filled your ears, but for once, you didn't feel afraid. 

Another thing you'd found out after the accident, was that you were now seeing things. 

A man. A man with a cracked face and sinister smile who seemed to want nothing more than to pester and torment you. 

You'd learnt quickly enough to take whatever he said with a grain of salt. More often than not, it seemed he just wanted to mess with your head. 

But this. This was different. For once, he didn't greet you with the horrific image of his face in front of your eyes, or his eyes blazing with magic that crackled and sizzled fiercely. 

It was just his voice.

"Decided to tone it down a little, Gramps?" You muttered bitterly to yourself, knowing that he could hear you.

_"Not in the slightest. I simply don’t have the time to materialise myself properly before he gets back."_

You snorted, choosing to pick at your nails rather than address him directly.

"What, are you scared of Sans?"

Silence.

You smirked a little, grabbing Sans’ pillow and laying your head down on it fully.

_"...Just be warned...your friendship with him will not continue. Not if I have any say in the matter."_

"What are you, his dad? He can choose whatever friends he likes."

You could hear his laughter in the air before you'd even finished talking. 

_"You know nothing, child. Nothing."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will give the person who guesses where the majority of my inspiration for this fic comes from: 
> 
> a still warm from the oven cookie  
> a gold star  
> a 1000 word one-shot about you and whatever undertale character you want
> 
> Happy fucking Hunger Games.


	12. THE ONE WHERE BED STUFF HAPPENS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, you guys _really_ wanna get a fresh cookie and a gold star, huh?
> 
> This chapter is up later than usual. I apologise. I got distracted playing that new Attack on Titan game that costs way too much money. 
> 
> I should not have paid that much money for a video game. Even if it _does_ make me feel like a badass. 
> 
> None of you have guessed right for the inspiration thing, by the way. You want another hint? 
> 
> One of the lines in the last chapter is a line that is said in the show/book I'm referencing. It's tweaked a little, but it has the same meaning, pretty much. It's quite a popular line, too. 
> 
> Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go cry over Marco dying. Again. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

True to his word, Sans blipped back into his room a few minutes later, a brown paper bag in his hand. 

The smell of grease filled your nostrils, and honestly, you thought you’d died and gone to heaven. 

"ew. i can see you practically drooling from over here," he joked as he placed the bag on his cabinet, before blipping out of the room. Seconds later he was back, two paper plates in hand. Classy. 

"Shut up. M’hungry..." You grumbled, reaching for the plate which he'd now filled with fries and a burger.

"i can see that," he chuckled, handing you the plate before slumping down next to you with his own, a content grin on his face.

The food was glorious, as always. The slight fizz of magic you felt as you chewed was a welcome feeling, and you hummed in approval.

"...Magic’s amazing," you sighed, more to yourself than anything, "after living here and tasting your food and...just...everything...I can't understand why human’s would just...give all this up..."

"because monster’s are clearly the better of the two species here," Sans chuckled, "and you humans really don't realise you've got a good thing till it’s gone." 

"Amen to that," you nodded, taking another bite of your burger.

"wow. you were quick to agree. what, no faith in humanity whatsoever?"

"Nah. People suck."

You swallowed the mouthful of burger, before continuing.

"People are cruel, and nasty. Most are extremely selfish and close-minded, too. You get a few decent ones, but not many."

"so you're one of the decent ones?"

"Oh, hell no," you almost laughed, but managed to hold it in, "I can be pretty selfish sometimes. Cruel too, I guess. Most people don't even realise they're doing it...I guess I'm decent in the sense that...I'm not at the other end of the spectrum."

"whaddaya mean?"

"...I wouldn't kill anyone."

You looked down at your food, suddenly losing your appetite.

"I would probably take a bullet for someone, if it came down to it. Or push someone out of the way if they were gonna be hit by a car or something...I’d sacrifice myself if it meant someone else would live."

Of course you would. It's not as if you valued your life or anything.

"...Monsters are different than humans. You guys...you understand better than anyone...lives are a precious thing...SOULs, too. Not many humans believe in that...I guess I didn't either, until I got down here and I saw it for myself...I guess what I'm trying to say is...humans are cruel, and judgemental. They only see what's on the surface, what they want to see...you monsters aren't like that. Not at all."

Your voice died out into nothing, and you sighed, choosing to pop some fries into your mouth and chew.

"...you are a decent human."

You glanced up, pausing your chewing to look at Sans as he spoke.

"your soul is warm, kind. a little tattered here and there, but i’ve already said i’ll help you with that...you don't have it in you to hurt anyone. and that's...a damn good job, considering a lot of us are defenceless. i mean, just imagine if a human who wanted nothing more than to dust us fell down here."

"...Dust you?"

"oh. yeah, i...forgot that you don't really do that...when a monster dies, their body turns to dust. it's tradition for the monster's remains to then be spread over the things they loved most."

"...I get ya," you nodded, "we have something similar on the surface. When a person dies, they can have their body burned and turned to ashes. Some people like to have their ashes scattered over things they hold dear...others...just get buried."

"huh."

You slipped into silence once again, and you bit at your lip as you began to think.

You'd actually thought about it before, what you would rather do. Burned or buried.

Well, at the end of the day, you guessed it didn't really matter.

Either way, you were dead.

"...i gotta question. about humans."

That took you off guard. You stared at Sans, watching him silently as he stared at his plate, slowly picking up a ketchup-drenched french fry.

"...Okay?"

"think you could answer for me?"

"Well, I won't know until you tell me what you wanna know."

He offered you a smirk, before pushing his plate to the side.

"okay. so. skin i kinda understand; it bruises and scars and stuff, but," he paused, his eyes darting to the newest scar that sat on your arm; a reminder of how close you'd been to dying three months ago.

"...what about everything else?"

"...You wanna learn about human anatomy," you stated, raising an eyebrow.

He almost looked...embarrassed? As he sat there, choosing to now stare at anything but you.

"it’s not like i’m askin’ you to do it for free or anything. anything you wanna know about monsters, i'll be your guide to...i just...wanna know how similar we are, is all."

Well, that was an interesting offer. You certainly did have your questions about monsters. 

"...Okay, sure. I'm game. What did you want to start with?"

"that...you have a skeleton, under your skin, but it's not held together by magic. how do you...y'know. stay together? obviously you've got skin, but...it's probably more than that, right?"

You nodded, smiling a little as you saw the curiosity sparkling in his eye sockets.

"Yeah, you're right. We also have muscle that holds everything in place. We'd...be a bit limp if we didn't. Also, our skeletons...don't really look like the skeletons you're probably used to. You're...a bit more...stocky? Big-boned? I guess? Papyrus is a more accurate representation of a human skeleton, except he's...super tall and...wears hot pants."

Sans snorted at that. 

"okay, you’ve answered that. now it's your turn. quiz me."

"...Do all monsters do magic? And is it all the same?"

Sans settled back into his pillow, and you joined him slowly, watching him.

"most monsters learn how to do magic at a very young age. it’s embedded into them as being as important as walking or eating. magic is a monster’s everything; it's a weapon, it's a shield. it can be used to protect or destroy. to love or hate. a monster's very life essence is its magic. a monster with low magic capabilities won't get very far..."

He paused, inhaling deeply, before continuing.

"as for your other question, no. all monsters have a different kind of magic. each has its own unique abilities. for example, you remember when i had to...pin you down three months ago?"

You shuddered at the reminder, but nodded.

"right. you remember how your body got super heavy? well, that's one of the things i can do with my blue magic. I can mess with the earth’s gravitational pull...a different kind of magic would be...green magic. undyne specialises in it. it can be used as a shield, but also to heal. i...taught myself a little bit of green magic a while ago, to help me and paps...smartest thing I ever did..."

"For the shield, or for the healing?"

"oh, the healing. paps was the clumsiest set of bones ever when he was younger. had to repair a fair amount of broken bones back in the day."

You nodded along, enjoying the happy grin that had settled on his face. Talking about his brother always seemed to put him in good spirits. 

"speakin' of time...how long is a human's life span? shorter than a monster's, i’m guessin’."

"You'd...probably be right," your mind instantly thought of Toriel, and how although she seemed to look young in appearance, the look in her eyes told you otherwise, "and it all depends on where in the world you live. I'm guessing that where I'm from, the average lifespan of a human is between...75 and 80 years. Although with medicine constantly being produced to help fight diseases and such, I'm guessing that'll rise steadily."

"gee...that's kinda...short."

You raised an eyebrow at him.

"Really? I think 75-80 years is a hell of a long time. You mean you guys live a lot longer?"

"yeah, well monsters don't exactly have physical matter holding them together. made mostly out of magic, remember? it means deterioration doesn't really...come into play until a good few centuries in. the king himself has been around for...a long time. and he's been on the throne since before i was around."

"...How old are you?"

He chuckled at your expression, nudging you with his shoulder gently.

"don't worry; i’m pretty young for a monster. i’m not talking centuries here. more like decades. kinda stopped keeping track a long time ago. age isn't really a big thing down here."

"...So in your terms, I'd be..."

"eh, doesn't really work like that. it would all depend on the kind of monster. some monsters mature rapidly, whilst others grow like you humans. some monsters use cocoons and hibernate and when they emerge they're fully grown. others grow with their magic. some monster’s rely solely on their hp to grow."

"...HP?"

You cocked your head to the side. Sounded like something out of a JRPG.

"hope. a monster’s will to live and grow. the more hp a monster has, the stronger they're said to be. monsters can train and increase their hp, and they grow with it."

Okay, so it was exactly like a JRPG. You didn't know whether to laugh or applaud at this point.

"How do you know how much HP you have?"

The question was innocent. However, when you saw Sans visibly tense up, you immediately regretted asking.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"n-no, it's...it's fine. i just...i guess i didn't...wanna be the one to show ya, is all."

Well, that sounded inviting. 

"...to show you my stats, i have to pull you into an encounter. just wanted to warn you. your soul will be fine. i promise."

"Oh...okay. Well...go ahead, I guess."

Sans sighed, his eye sockets sliding closed as he lifted his left hand.

You felt a familiar tugging in your chest, and all of a sudden, you were thrown into...well, you didn't really know how to describe it.

Sans sat opposite you, his face etched with his trademark grin. Your eyes darted down to the cracked heart floating in front of your chest, before looking back up to him.

"...okay, now do me a favour and concentrate in front of you...yeah, like that," Sans voice was calm and soothing in your ears, and you hummed a little, closing your eyes for a moment, before opening them again. 

In front of you were four words: FIGHT, ACT, ITEM, and MERCY.

"now select act." You moved your hand in front of you, reaching out and running your fingers along the word. "now check."

A faint buzz met your ears as you selected the word. You waited, a little confused when you weren't greeted with the information you were after.

"look up."

Sans voice was warm, inviting. You looked up.

And there in front of him, for the world to see, were his stats.

**SANS: HP - 10  
** ATK - 1  
DEF - 5  
'Your best friend here in the Underground.' 

"...to compare, paps has nearly 700 hp...probably why he's so tall..."

There was something extremely sad in Sans’ expression in that moment. You felt your SOUL throb uncomfortably, the action causing your body to ache.

You looked down at your options again.

**ACT.**

**COMFORT.**

Your SOUL pushed itself forwards, hovering in front of Sans’ face. You felt yourself moving forward too, not wanting to be too far away from it. 

You slowly brought your arms up, wrapping them around his neck and pulling him to you in a gentle hug. 

"...You still have a little HoPe," you whispered softly, "that's better than nothing...right?"

You could feel the skeleton tensing against you, before he winded his arms around you, squeezing you a little. 

"...yeah."

**ACT. CHECK.**

**SANS: HP - 10  
** ATK - 1  
DEF - 5  
'He won't say it out loud, but he really appreciates those words.' 

 

The questions flew back and forth between the two of you easily after the SOUL display.

The more you asked, the more you found yourself fascinated by monsters; there were so many similarities, yet still so much that was different.

You opened your mouth to ask another question - your mind had come to the conclusion that you _had_ to ask about how monster babies were made - when three sharp knocks at Sans’ door interrupted you. 

You froze. 

"BROTHER. _____."

You heaved out a sigh of relief at the familiar voice.

"yeah, bro?"

The door creaked open, and Papyrus poked his head through the crack with what could only be described as a worried look on his face.

Sans noticed immediately, and was off the mattress and by his brother’s side in an instant, opening the door more.

"what's wrong, pap?"

"I...WELL...UNDYNE, SHE..." Papyrus let out a sigh.

"SHE’S GOING TO BE STAYING OVER TONIGHT...I’M SORRY, I TRIED TO STOP HER, BUT SHE SQUINTED HER EYES LIKE SHE WAS SUSPICIOUS AND KEPT ASKING ME WHY NOT AND..."

The hairs on the back of your neck bristled, and you glanced warily at the brothers. Spending a few hours near her was bad enough. Now you had to spend the entire night?

"...So what do we do?" You asked, chewing at you bottom lip. 

"YOU’LL HAVE TO SLEEP IN HERE TONIGHT. IT’S THE ONLY OPTION!"

"bro, what-"

"Wait, I don't-"

"ITS DECIDED! YOU TWO ARE GOOD FRIENDS, SO IT’S FINE! BESIDES, _____; YOU SPEND MOST OF YOUR TIME IN HERE WITH SANS ANYWAY, SO IT SHOULDN'T BE ANY DIFFERENT TO WHAT YOU'RE USED TO! ANYWAY, UNDYNE’LL BE BACK SOON SINCE SHE SAID SHE WOULD SPRINT ALL THE WAY TO HER HOUSE TO GRAB HER STUFF, SO I’LL SAY GOODNIGHT NOW! GOODNIGHT!" 

And with that, Papyrus closed the door in Sans’ face.

...Well this was awkward.

"...i’ll take the floor," Sans began, and your eyes widened.

"What? No you won't. It's your bed. I’ll take the floor."

"don't be stupid. you're not sleepin’ on my floor."

"And I'm not getting into an argument over this, Sans. I'm sleeping on your floor, and that's final."

 

How did this happen?

Your brain was frantically screaming at you as you tried your hardest to get comfortable on your side of the bed.

That's right. Your side. 

Stubborn bastard wouldn't let you have the perfectly good floor. 

"quit squirmin’," you heard Sans mumble into his pillow, "you're worse than pap..."

"Fuck off to sleep, bone boy!" You whispered harshly, turning your body away from him, choosing instead to look at the wall on the other end of the room. 

"i’d be able to if ya weren't wriggling around like a moldsmol," he grumbled. 

"This is what you get for not letting me sleep on the floor."

You heard a faint groan, before silence. 

Sighing, you reached onto the floor and checked your phone.

12:36am.

Wonderful.

Your eyes trailed to the window, and you watched the snow falling outside quietly. Maybe you’d be able to doze off watching it...

Your SOUL gave a flutter against your rib cage, and you pressed against the skin of your chest, confused. 

You felt Sans’ gaze on you, and you looked over at him, offering him a tired smile. 

"What's up?" You murmured softly to him.

Flutter. 

"...nothin’."

You raised an eyebrow, before letting out a small snort.

Flutter.

"Sure, Sansafrass."

"...you cold?"

"Huh?"

"...looks like it's getting kinda cold over your end." Sans opened his arms, inviting you closer. "you're sharing my bed. might as well share all of it."

Flutter. Thump. 

Now that you thought about it, you were getting cold. You wriggled a little closer, still keeping a fair amount of distance between the two of you.

"i’m not poisonous, _____."

"I know! I just...figured...y'know."

"...right."

You closed your eyes, wanting nothing more than to slip into a dreamless sleep. You knew it wasn't going to happen, but hell if you weren't determined to try.

Besides, this situation was getting way too embarrassing.

You'd slept in the same bed as your best friend plenty of times before, but this...this was different.

You let out a small squeak as you felt Sans’ arms wrap around your waist and tug gently, pulling your head against his rib cage.

It was...a lot more comfier than you'd thought it'd be. Although he was wearing a shirt, so.

Flutter thump. Flutter thump.

"...night, _____."

You opened your eyes a little, quickly coming to the conclusion that you couldn't see shit with your head pressed against him, before accepting defeat and winding your arms around his bony body, your hands settling near his shoulder blades.

"...Night, Sans."

Flutter thump. Flutter thump. Flutter thump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a complete and utter shitshow I'm sorry.


	13. THE ONE WHERE THINGS GET AWKWARD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I'm really surprised no one picked up on Sans having more HP than he should. Because he does. That wasn't a typo. 
> 
> This is slowly turning into a character study for Sans instead of the Reader Insert I wanted but fuck it I enjoy writing this. 
> 
> Just a heads up, this chapter contains the reader having a panic attack. This was difficult to write for me, so if any of you suffer with them like I do, then just a warning. It made my anxiety flare up a little when I re-read it. 
> 
> Guess that means I'm doing a good job writing it, huh?
> 
> Also, there will be NO UPDATE next week. I've actually just got into something big with a voice acting partner, so next week will be dedicated to getting recording and video editing done. 
> 
> Thanks for your support and kudos, guys. I really appreciate it.
> 
> ~Dawn~

**sans: this is a bad idea, _____.**

**sans: i mean it. i can feel it in my bones.**

**sans: and for once that wasn't meant to be a joke.**

You rolled your eyes, snuggling in further to the warmth of your coat. 

Or rather, San's coat. He'd been adamant in letting you borrow it when you mentioned you were going to walk around Snowdin today. Considering Undyne had gone back to her house for a while, you had free roam of the town once again.

You'd earned a harsh flutter from your SOUL when you'd wrapped yourself up in the padded fabric cosily. 

Speaking of, you were going to have to sit Sans down and talk about that later. It was kinda getting annoying. 

Especially when the fluttering woke you up in the morning.

**sans: answer my texts you munchkin.**

**_____: Munchkin? The fuck am I; a 5 year old?**

**sans: that's 5g for the swear jar. i'm telling paps.**

**_____: Grow up, dude.**

**sans: nah**

**sans: tried that once**

**sans: wasn't impressed with the results.**

**sans: we're getting off track here. what i’m trying to say is that you're crazy for thinking you can magically get a job here in**

You huffed out a sigh, before sending him a reply.

**_____: Rude. You use magic as an excuse all the time, and I don't call you crazy. And I told you already, you're not talking me out of this, Sans. I'm going to start pulling my weight around here, whether you like it or not. You need help paying the rent, and since you insist on treating Paps like an ignorant baby bones, it's fallen to me to pick up the pieces, and considering I'm super tired right now, I strongly advise you drop this.**

**sans: hi super tired**

**sans: i’m sans**

**_____: FU.**

**sans: what does fu mean.**

**_____: FUCK. YOU.**

**sans: kinky ;)**

You pocketed your phone at that.

Digging your hands deep into the pockets of Sans’ coat, you chose to march towards the first building you glimpsed upon; the little shop where you'd bought your clothes. You'd initially thought Grillby’s, but the sentry dogs came in there too much, and you'd already had them sniffing around you more than you wanted. 

Yeah, the shop was small and cozy. You could handle doing retail. 

You made your way over quickly, slipping in through the door and closing it behind you quietly. The rabbit lady from before was slumped against the counter, her chin in her hands. At the sound of the door, she hopped into life; a wide smile on her furry cheeks.

"Ah! Hello, youngster! Come back to browse some more? I have to say, those new clothes fit you nicely! You look lovely!"

You smiled bashfully at the compliment, ducking your head further into Sans’ hood.

"T-Thanks...but, no, I'm not here to browse. I, uh...actually wanted to ask you something."

"I'm all ears, hun bun," she wiggled her ears with a laugh.

"I...uh...well, I was wondering...I've been living with Sans and Papyrus for a while now and...I kinda want to ...give something back to them, y’know? For all the hospitality they've shown me. So, I decided to start helping Sans pay rent...only problem being, I don't exactly have a job that could help with that...so I was wondering if-"

"-You want to know if I needed any help here," the rabbit monster said, raising an eyebrow at you. You nodded in response.

"...Well, I myself don't really need anyone else to help with things around here. As you can tell, things don't exactly get busy here...although, my sister next door could probably use some help soon. What with her choosing to take the next step in her bond."

"Bond?"

The word left your mouth before you could stop yourself, and you tensed up when the monster gave you a confused look.

"Oh, didn't you know? The whole towns talking about it. She's pretty excited too, considering the two have been together for so long."

"O-oh, I didn't realise your...sister was seeing anybody." You tried to play off your little slip up with ignorance, smiling timidly at her.

"Tch. You city folk. Blind to love, I tell ya." She sighed, a smile itching at her lips. "Although, I guess it's understandable, considering you're recently bonded yourself. Living like that must be nice, huh? Such a happy hum, right, hun bun?"

Wait, what?

"Excuse me?" 

"Oh, don't act so innocent. I can feel that smaller one’s magic swirling around you like a shield. Besides, you're even wearing his coat, and he doesn't take that off for anyone! He must be the protective, possessive kind of bond mate, right?"

Thump.

"...I have to go."

"Oh! Shall I pass on the message to my sister that you're interested in working?"

You nodded blankly, giving your name to her before walking out of the shop. Your back hit the door, and you leaned against it heavily, inhaling deeply.

What did she mean, bond mate? And Sans - none of this made sense.

You needed to talk to him. Now.

His magic was fucking with your SOUL. It was interfering so much other monsters were starting to notice it. 

Pulling your phone out of your pocket, you unlocked the screen, greeted with a few new messages from the skeleton himself. 

**sans: was that too much?**

**sans: sorry if i offended you. you know i get carried away sometimes.**

**sans: ignoring me now, are we?**

**sans: hey**

**sans: heyyyyyy**

**sans: u okay?**

**sans: my soul just did this weird jumpy thing. want me to come over?**

**sans: i know you said you were fine, but if you're not, now would be a good time to tell me.**

**sans: you gonna be home soon? m'gettin antsy waiting for you to come back.**

**sans: don't come back okay just stay where you are i’ll come and find yo-**

You opened the door to the house, staring at the last message, when you heard a sharp intake of breath.

You looked up.

And your body froze.

 

A single bright yellow eye stared at you in shock, and you could do nothing but stare straight back, your entire being frozen in complete and utter terror.

You'd heard Papyrus talk about Undyne. But seeing her like this, in the flesh...this was a whole new ball-game.

You wanted to curl up into a ball and fade from existence. You wanted so badly to rewind time for just a few seconds to before you opened that door. 

You should've stopped to finish reading Sans’ text before you came home. 

You watched as Undyne slowly stood, gulping hard when you noticed that she was nearly the same size as Papyrus; how that was possible, you didn't know, but it terrified you. 

"...Who’s this?"

Her voice was quiet, yet you could hear her gritting her teeth in what you guessed was pure rage. 

Papyrus stared at you pitifully, his eye sockets telling you to stay calm, to not do anything rash.

Against your better judgement, you ignored him.

You bolted out of the door, taking a sharp left and dashing away as fast as you could. You heard Undyne yell, and moments later Papyrus, too. Were they fighting? Oh god, they were fighting, weren't they...

But still, you didn't stop. Your lungs were burning, your legs were burning, your SOUL was burning with sheer panic, but you kept running. You stumbled blindly through a fog-covered tundra, the snow coming up to your knees at points.

You heard her. You could hear her following you. Her angry yells and Papyrus’ pleas for her to stop, to reconsider. 

The snow came to an end at some point, replaced with a dark navy ground which looked much more cave-like than anything else you'd seen thus far in the underground. You gasped for breath, staggering along the craggy ground with no destination; you'd never ventured out this far before, so you didn't have a clue where to go.

All you could do was hide and hope she didn't find you.

Your SOUL twitched a little in response, and you skidded to a stop.

But, how would it be better after this? Undyne knew you existed now, and she’d hunt you down until you were dead. And then, what about her and Papyrus? Chances are you'd destroyed their friendship, too. She wouldn't be able to trust him, if she knew that he'd been harbouring a human. You'd destroyed his chances of getting into the Royal Guard...

You were pathetic. You deserved to die. 

You hung your head, your legs refusing to move despite the panic that coursed through your veins. Would it hurt? Probably. She'd probably make it hurt.

Thump.

You were doing so well. You were finally starting to feel happy again, but you fucked it up. Just like you always fucked everything up.

Thump.

And Sans. You never...you never even got to say goodbye to him.

"_____!"

Your head snapped up as you felt a hand grab yours and tug, pulling you along. 

Sans.

He didn't even spare you a glance as he rounded a corner; his eye sockets devoid of light as he stepped closer to a waterfall that was surging through a crack in the ceiling.

"through here." He muttered, pushing you into the water. You struggled a little, waving your arms as the water choked you a little, before stumbling through to a room on the other side. 

Sans dragged you to the corner of the room, before draping his soaking wet coat - you hadn't even realise it'd slipped off - over your head, sending you into darkness.

"stay quiet."

You didn't dare say no. His voice was hard, blunt. 

Moments of silence ticked by, and you had to catch the breath in your throat since the noise against the wet fabric of the coat was too loud for you.

"...okay. i think we're good for now."

You heaved out a shaky sigh of relief, only to wince as the coat was pulled from your head.

Sans stood above you, his eye sockets locked on your curled up form, watching you silently. 

You wanted to stare right back; stand your ground and show some spine for a change, but...you couldn't. Not now. 

You ended up looking away, choosing to stare at the navy floor in silence.

"...are you alright?" His voice was calm, quiet, caring. You shrugged. 

"she didn't hit you, did she?" You shook your head. 

"oh, good." You could hear the relief clear as day in his voice. 

"...You should've let her get me." The words that left your mouth, for once, didn't feel like your own. 

"what?"

"Undyne. You should've let her take me, kill me."

"don't be stupid. like i’m gonna let that happen."

"You should've. Everyone would be one step closer to freedom, right?" You looked up at him, your face blank as you stared. "Human SOULs. That's what you guys need to break the barrier, right? So, take mine."

"you're worth more alive than dead to me, _____."

His blunt words hit you like a kick to the gut. You were worth more alive than dead? What were you, a hostage? Some kind of bargaining chip?

"...I don't understand," you muttered slowly, feeling your jaw clench in anger, "I came up to this god-damn mountain to disappear, and I know for a fact very few people on the surface would've cared less. Hell, they would've probably encouraged me to end it.

"But, when I get down here, all I hear is, 'you're better off alive', 'your SOUL is precious', and 'you're not broken'. Stupid. When will you all realise that I _am_ broken? When will you all realise I _am_ better off dead?! When will you realise that my SOUL is _just_ a SOUL, like any other humans - it's not special or unique - it's fucking broken and shattering and being held together by a...by a monster! A monster who...who I thought I could trust. Who I thought was a friend. But now, with this talk of bonding and...all this other shit, I don't know what to think!" 

You were glaring at him now, anger bubbling fast in your veins. 

"So tell me, Sans. Can I really trust you? Can I really treat you as a friend? Because, if I can, then tell me what the _fuck_ you've done to my SOUL."

You heard the man from the Void’s words echo in the back of your head.

"...Or am I just a toy to you? Some...frail little human that you can mess with until I get boring and then you-"

**"enough."**

You inhaled sharply, feeling your SOUL throb against your chest painfully. 

The lights in his eyes were gone now, and your brain started screaming at you, telling you how stupid you were to speak your mind at a time like this. And as you stared into those empty sockets, you realised something. 

You were scared of Sans. 

You could feel the tears welling in your eyes, and you jumped a little in surprise as a loud sob left your mouth. You rubbed your eyes pitifully with your sleeves, wanting nothing more than to run away from the skeleton at this point. 

"...that's enough, okay?"

You blinked away the tears as best as you could, noticing that Sans was now kneeling in front of you, his eyes dim and hollow-looking. 

"I...I'm sorry," you began, another sob bubbling in your throat, "I'm sorry, Sans...I'm sorry..."

"it's okay, _____...it's okay...it'll all be okay..."

You were hyperventilating. Your head hurt. Oh god, it hurt...

"I-I'm s-sorry...I'm s-sorry! I d-didn't mean it! I'm sorr-y!"

"i know. i know. it's okay."

"It w-wont be! I-it won't! How c-can...h-how can y-you stand being n-near me ri-ght now, after w-what I said?" 

"ssshhh...it's okay..."

"I...I should just...go die! I sh-ould go and just end it and be done w-with it! I h-hate this! I hate myself! I w-want to die!" You were shrieking now, the pain in your head from your impending panic attack was enough to make you want to claw your eyes out. 

You felt Sans hands on you, slowly pulling you into his lap as you shook terribly. 

"it’s okay, _____. just breathe for me, okay? i need you to breathe..."

"NO! _N-NO!_ " You shook your head from side to side as the pain increased, not sure whether you were screaming at Sans to stop or for the pain to. Your head felt like it was being backed onto by a car; its wheel crushing your head excruciatingly slow. You slammed your fists against the sides of your face, trying to rattle your head enough to stop it.

"breathe. just breathe."

"S-Sanssss..."

"i’m here, _____. breathe."

Inhale. Exhale. 

"that's it. again. breathe."

Inhale. Exhale. Thump.

"and again."

Inhale. Thump. Exhale. Thump.

"...that's my girl..."

Inhale. Thump. Thump. Thump. Exhale. 

"...sleep now, okay? you don't have to worry about anything. i’m here. i’ll always be here."

Thump. You nodded slowly. Thump. Your body sagged against his weakly. Thump. You closed your eyes. Thump.

And your SOUL called out for his.

Thump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bunny Shopkeeper is my new favourite character. Move off the podium, Sans; you've been replaced. 
> 
> Also, lmao reader you're so fucked.


	14. THE ONE WHERE YOU TALK TO DAD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's late, and for that I apologise. I've had a shit day. 
> 
> Long story short, I've injured myself. Again. Apparently falling off a horse will do that to you. I've spent 5 hours up A&E today, and now that I'm finally home, I'm immobile. 
> 
> I'm tired. My leg hurts. My wrist hurts. I'm fucking done with today.
> 
> After I post this I'm gonna lay down and play Mystic Messenger and cry. 
> 
> Thanks for your patience. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

You’d had this dream before.

The nice dream. The one where you climb up this huge tower; not using the stairs, but instead climbing along the outside, your fingers gripping at the uneven brickwork easily and securing you in place. 

You'd never fall in this dream. You always managed to hold on. You never ever felt in any danger.

...Turns out even your dreams wanted to screw you over.

One minute, you were climbing; your fingers forcing themselves between blackened bricks whilst your feet scrabbled for purchase, and the next, you were falling, the ground coming to meet you quickly. 

You landed. Your bones cracked and snapped and splintered. You shrieked in agony. 

And then you woke up, covered in sweat and trembling.

You called out for Sans, your voice weak and croaky, but for once he didn't come. It was dark. You couldn't see. But you knew you were in his room. You recognised the musty smell.

_"Awake, I see?"_

His presence made itself known, and your nerves jumped in response. 

"...Go away," you whispered. You couldn't speak with him right now.

The man from the void materialised in front of you, his body glitching and morphing in and out of existence as he stared, his face a horrific mismatch of shapes. 

_"Your pathetic demands have no place here. I shall be where I want to be."_

"Leave me alone..." You responded, your voice quivering, "haven't you done enough?"

_"Me? What could I have possibly done?"_

"Oh, plenty, I'm sure." You paused, hearing muted voices downstairs. 

 

"...undyne, please."

"How could hide her from me, short stack?! You have _no_ right to decide her fate!"

Undyne. Your body went cold. 

"i’m already using my magic to hold her soul together, so as far as i’m concerned, yeah, i do."

"Oh, yeah, about that? That's disgusting. Why the hell did you think that was a good idea?!"

"she was gonna die. it was the greatest god-damn idea i’ve ever had, and i’d do it again, if that meant seeing her happy and alive."

"Man, you're pussy-whipped, alright. Is mating with humans really that great?"

"U-UNDYNE!"

"I thought I told you to wait your turn, Papyrus...!"

**"don't you dare talk to my brother that way. i don't care if you are captain of the royal guard. i’ll throw you out of my house."**

 

_"...Heh."_

Your eyes darted to the man who now sat on the edge of the bed, his body shaking with silent laughter.

"...Something funny?" You murmured, your voice unable to go any higher.

_"...That woman's right. He is pussy-whipped...that bond he made with you will certainly be his downfall..."_

Okay, you'd had enough.

"Stop it. What is it with everyone and this...bond shit? I keep hearing about it when people talk about us, but no one - and I mean, no one - has given me a proper answer as to what the hell it actually is. So, explain."

_"...Would you like me to use small words...?"_

"Fuck you. Just tell me in the simplest way possible. I don't have the luxury of knowing everything about magic like you monsters do."

_"...Soul mates."_

Huh?

_"That's something you humans have on the surface, yes? That's what you and Sans are."_

Wait wait wait-

_"When Sans infused his magic with your SOUL, he created the link for a bond to form. The more your SOUL synchronises with his magic, the stronger that bond will become. It is as simple as that."_

"...That's...not simple at all."

Your brain was frazzled, and your SOUL was throbbing with a nervous rhythm that you couldn't control as you processed this new information. You had no doubt that Sans could feel it; that jittery hum as you lost yourself in thought.

_"If it's any consolation, he didn't mean to make the bond quite so strong. He was simply trying to save you when he bonded his magic to you. He may have...gotten a little carried away..."_

"...So this is your fault..."

Your hands tightened into fists in your lap. 

"You're the reason my SOUL - fuck, his SOUL, too - has been so messed up! All this...throbbing and fluttering and thumping it’s doing is your fault!"

_"...I will confess, I did not see this as a possible outcome when I injected you with the Void...but he's always managed to surprise me, that boy..."_

There was an odd kind of...fondness in his tone when he spoke, and any words you had in your mind disappeared.

"...Who is Sans to you?" You met his empty gaze, "and Papyrus, too." 

He let out a warped chuckle, before turning towards the door. 

_"That's not something I wish to tell you, child. Perhaps if you ask Sans, you'll get an answer..."_

"Oh yeah, sure, that'll go down well," you muttered, remembering the last time you'd brought up anything remotely related to the Void. You'd been greeted with silence and a stare that told you not to meddle. 

You'd made sure to stay away from the subject after that.

"...Can I at least get a name to work with?" You sighed, flinching when you heard the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs. 

_"..._

His voice was subdued, almost sad. You turned to look at him, eyes widening when his form began to vanish.

_"...My name is Wingdings Gaster. Remember that, child..."_

And with that, he was gone. As the final wisp of his existence disappeared, a knock came at the door; three quick taps against the wood.

"...C-come in..." You murmured softly, unable to keep the tremble out of your voice. 

Gaster. The name made you go cold. 

 

You let out a sigh of relief when you saw Papyrus pop his head in the doorway, a grim look on his face.

"...HOW ARE YOU FEELING, HUMAN?"

You heard a muffled snarl come from downstairs which you could only guess came from Undyne. You shuddered.

"...Okay. Thanks for asking, Papyrus."

"I...I’VE COME TO TAKE YOU DOWNSTAIRS. UNDYNE WANTS TO...TALK."

Another shudder ran through you.

"...Talk?"

"YES. SANS AND I HAVE EXPLAINED YOUR...SITUATION TO HER BUT SHE...WANTS TO SEE FOR HERSELF. IF YOUR SOUL CAN BE USED FOR THE BARRIER."

And if it could? What then? You'd die at the hands of her and that'd be it?

You found yourself growing angry, and your SOUL gave a sharp flutter against your chest.

"DON’T WORRY, YOU'LL BE SAFE. SANS HAS BEEN ON HIGH ALERT EVER SINCE HE BROUGHT YOU BACK HERE. HE...HE’LL PROTECT YOU."

And risk getting him and his brother in even more shit? Not likely. 

"Thanks, but...I think it would be best if I talked to Undyne alone for a while...it'll be easier to meet a mutual agreement if there isn't a third party involved..."

"...VERY WELL, HUMAN. BUT WE SHALL STAY CLOSE, JUST IN CASE. IS THAT OKAY?"

He sounded so unsure of himself, small and reserved. Nothing like the Papyrus you knew. You slowly climbed out of bed, stretching a little, before walking to the door and opening it. 

You wasted no time in reaching for Papyrus, your hands wrapping around the upper bones of his arms, and squeezing gently. It was a weird feeling. 

"Don't worry. I'll be fine." You offered him a small smile. "I have to be."

He grinned at you in return, before pulling away and leading you down the stairs.

You had to be strong. For Sans and Papyrus. They weren't the ones at fault here, and you were going to show that to Undyne.

Yet as you stepped fully into the living room and saw her standing there, glaring at you with hatred unhidden, your resolve wavered.

Holy _fuck_ she was scary. 

Sans wandered up to you, his face serious. 

"you okay?"

You nodded mutely, gulping down your fear. 

"she won't lay a hand on you. not while i’m here."

"Sans, it's fine. We're just gonna talk."

You hoped. God, you hoped. 

"SANS. LET’S GO INTO THE KITCHEN."

"bro?"

You could feel the twinge your SOUL gave as Sans’ magic reacted to his brother's words, and you winced. 

"It's fine. I wanna talk with her alone for a while," you answered, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing, just like you had for Papyrus. He eyed you cautiously.

"you sure? what if she-"

"-Sans. It's fine. Go be with your brother for a while, okay? I'll call you if I need anything."

He stared at you, the worry etched deep into his skull, before heaving out a sigh and shoving his hands in his pockets.

"...c’mon, bro."

"YES! YOU CAN HELP ME MAKE MY FAMOUS FRIENDSHIP SPAGHETTI FOR EVERYONE!"

Sans turned back to stare at you with a helpless expression, and you couldn't help but smile.

"Go help your brother," you urged, failing to conceal your laughter as he let out a small groan of exasperation, before trudging into the kitchen, Papyrus hot on his heels. 

"...Man, you’ve really got it bad for each other."

You were expecting anger, hatred. But the voice that left Undyne sounded decidedly...more awkward. 

"I...um...I'm sorry...?"

"He's wrapped around your little finger. That bond he made to keep you alive started up some truly weird shit, lemme tell ya," Undyne sighed, leaning back on her heels as she looked up at the ceiling, her arms behind her head, "I mean, who knew it was possible for a monster and a human to form a bond? No one would even think about attempting it...until now. The circumstances are...fucked up, but still...you're bonded together, alright..."

You didn't know what to say. Hearing her explain it just made your head hurt more.

"...But that's not why I'm here. Show me your SOUL."

Before you could even react, you heard Sans let out a strained grumble from the doorway of the kitchen. His left eye was aglow with blue magic, and you gulped hard.

"like hell is she showing you her soul."

"Relax, short stuff. I'm not trying to steal her from you. Fuck, you're so possessive it’s starting to piss me off..."

"_____, don't show it to her."

"SANS! GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN AND LET THE LADIES HAVE THEIR TALK!"

A gloved hand appeared behind Sans, grabbing him by his hood and tugging him backwards. The magic flared in his eye with surprise, and he let out a muffled grunt as he was pulled away, his arms flailing. 

You couldn't help it. You laughed. 

It was a terrified, I'm about to shit myself laugh, but it was a laugh nonetheless. 

"So, human. SOUL?"

"Oh...yeah...how do I...?"

She sighed, her one visible eye narrowing in irritation.

"You didn't even teach her to pull her own SOUL out? Man, what kind of bond mate are you, Sans? How the hell are you meant to do all the good stuff without it out?"

"shut it, fish face."

"BITE ME, BONE BOY!"

Wow. Now you knew where Papyrus got his volume from. 

"Could you do it? It works when you enter a FIGHT, right?"

"You're askin' me to pull you into an encounter?" She let out a bellow of a laugh that shook the house, "you've got balls, I'll give ya that!"

You could feel the crackle of Sans magic from the kitchen; it had a familiar coolness to it that you'd grown accustomed to feeling when he was around, as opposed to Papyrus, who’s magic always felt warm and energetic. 

And Undyne’s? Undyne’s was on a whole other level. 

Her magic was scolding, with how fiercely it crackled. You could practically feel the power radiating from her from your place on the opposite side of the couch. 

You felt a tug against your chest. That weird sense of vertigo that you still hadn't gotten used to. Sans letting out an almost inaudible growl at Undyne.

And then, your SOUL was floating in front of your chest. 

Undyne immediately raised an eyebrow.

"...Pink? I've never seen a SOUL that colour before...I wonder what trait your SOUL represents."

She took a step forward, her one visible eye narrowing. 

"...So many cracks, too. Geez, these guys weren't kidding when they said you took a beating." She turned her head towards the kitchen, catching the glare of Sans who stood, watching, "and you can't heal this?"

"the damage wasn't caused down here. can't heal something like this that quickly."

"Pfft. I could give it a shot. I'm adept at green magic."

"if you think i’m gonna let you lay a finger on her-"

"-Sans. Stop."

You were getting tired of his possessiveness. You got that your SOULs were linked, but you sure as hell weren't his. 

He went quiet, and you inhaled deeply, before looking at Undyne.

"...So, what's the verdict?"

"...There's no way your SOUL would survive once you died. It'd shatter too quickly. Hell, it's practically shattering now..."

You waited quietly, feeling the tension thick in the air. 

"...And with Sans being the way he is, I don't think I could get away with killing you. Not now, anyway."

"...Oh. Well...good."

You offered her a small shaky smile. 

And then your legs buckled out from underneath you.

 

You heard a yell of concern as your knees hit the floor, and a wave of intense magic crashed over you as you felt yourself being pulled back up.

"undyne! get away from her soul!"

"WILL YOU BACK OFF?! I’M NOT GONNA DO ANYTHING TO HER!"

"G-guys, please..."

Your words came out as a croaky whisper, and your SOUL throbbed in discomfort. 

"can't you feel that?! her soul’s terrified of you!"

"OH, GET OFF MY ASS, SKELETON! I WASN'T GONNA HURT HER! AND IF ANYTHING, HER SOUL’S MORE FRANTIC AROUND YOU THAN ME-"

"ENOUGH!"

Papyrus’ sharp tone cut through the arguing, and everything went silent. You glanced up at the taller skeleton, watching him with wide eyes. He stood with his arms folded across his chest, an unimpressed look on his face.

"YOU'RE BOTH TO BLAME FOR THE HUMAN’S SOUL GOING HAYWIRE! JUST LISTEN TO YOURSELVES! YOU SOUND LIKE WILD ANIMALS! HAVE YOU NO DIGNITY OR SHAME TO YOU AT ALL?!"

You offered Papyrus a grateful smile as he tapped his foot irritably.

"THE HUMAN IS TIRED, AND HER SOUL NEEDS REST. SO, IF YOU DON'T MIND," he paused to bend down and lift you up into his arms, causing you to let out a surprised squeak, "I’M GOING TO TAKE THE HUMAN INTO MY ROOM FOR SOME MUCH NEEDED RELAXATION. GOOD NIGHT TO YOU BOTH!"

And with that, he stomped up the stairs with you, kicking the door to his room open with his foot and taking you inside. 

He dropped you unceremoniously onto his bed, before moving to close his door. He gave one last unimpressed glare out towards his brother and friend, before slamming his door shut. 

"...Thank you, Papyrus."

He sighed heavily, pressing his skull up against the wood.

"...YOU'RE WELCOME, HUMAN. I COULD SEE THAT ALL THEIR BICKERING WAS MAKING YOU UNCOMFORTABLE. FEEL FREE TO SLEEP IN MY ROOM TONIGHT, IF MY BROTHER’S FOUL MOOD DETERS YOU SO MUCH YOU CAN’T STAND IT."

Being away from Sans for a while did sound...inviting, you had to admit. You honestly felt smothered and drained, so maybe a few hours away from him would do you some good. 

"Okay. Thank you again, Paps..."

He glanced you from his spot by the door, grinning happily. 

"PAPS. ONLY SANS CALLS ME THAT."

Your eyes widened, and you opened your mouth to apologise.

"IT’S FINE. I...I LIKE IT WHEN YOU SAY IT. IT SOUNDS NICE COMING FROM SOMEONE ELSE. FEEL FREE TO KEEP USING IT."

You slowly closed your mouth, feeling your SOUL bubbling with happy energy. You didn't know how he did it, but Papyrus always seemed to make your SOUL practically glow with optimism. 

"...Hey, Paps...did you wanna maybe...make spaghetti together tomorrow?"

His eye sockets lit up at the mention of the pasta, and he clasped his gloved hands together, practically quivering.

"YOU MEAN IT?!"

"Yeah...it'll be nice to spend some time with you...just you, without your brother interfering."

"OOH! YOU MEAN LIKE A DATE?!"

You raised an eyebrow, before shaking your head, sighing. 

"...More like a...friendly hangout."

"SO A PLATONIC DATE?"

You resisted the urge to slam your head against the wall.

"Sure let’s go with that."

"WOWIE! I...I MUST PREPARE FOR THIS COMPLETELY PLATONIC, FRIENDLY HANGOUT DATE! I HAVE TO BRUSH MY HAIR! MY TEETH! PICK OUT THE PERFECT OUTFIT! YOU REST HUMAN, FOR I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL BE SURE TO BE PREENED TO PERFECTION BY THE TIME YOU ARE FULLY RESTED! NYEH-HEH-HEH!"

And with that, he was gone; his body slipping out of the door quickly and slamming it shut behind him. 

You slumped down on his bed with a quiet groan, your eyes sliding shut. 

You wondered if you could finally get some well-deserved rest now...

The cold feeling that gripped at your SOUL made you crack open an eye, muttering out a curse.

"...What do you want, Gaster?"

The name felt weird on your tongue. You closed your eyes, hoping you could just ignore him. It wouldn't be the first time.

_"...Thank you for being so kind to my son...to both of them..."_

Your eyes snapped open, and you opened your mouth to speak, but before the words could leave you, he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Who else is a slut for pain and suffering???_
> 
> also if anybody's willing could you maybe write some cute reader shit with 707/Luciel from Mystic Messenger for me? I don't ask for much but I'm crying because he's so perfect and these painkillers aren't helping. 
> 
> Fuck me.


	15. THE ONE WHERE YOU REALISE YOU WRITE TOO MUCH: VOLUME 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ.**
> 
>  
> 
> **This fic will now be on a one month break. My mind has hit a roadblock regarding where I wanna go with this and how fast I want things to go, so I'm gonna take a step back for a while and give myself some time to think carefully and maybe set up a storyboard plan.**
> 
>  
> 
> **This isn't me abandoning the story. Far from it. I'm just taking a little break from it to get the wind back in my sails.**
> 
>  
> 
> **If I manage to get inspired, then I'll come off my break early and post. However, if not, then I'll post in 4 weeks time.**
> 
>  
> 
> **This doesn't mean that I'm not going to be uploading anything. I have a bunch one-shots in the works - some Undertale, some not - so expect to see some of them in the near future.**
> 
>  
> 
> **Thank you for your patience and continued support, everyone. It means a lot to me. It really does.**
> 
>  
> 
> Okay, now that that's done, I apologise in advance for this chapter. My wrists still in pretty bad shape; it's currently in a splint and I can barely move it. Plus, writing this was hard. Like, my mind was coming up blank.
> 
> I'm sorry. 
> 
> Anyway, regardless, I hope you enjoy this short chapter. 
> 
> ~Dawn~

_16 - 03 - 20XX_

_I can't believe I'm trying this._

_Hello._

_You're following me, aren't you?_

_Mr. Creepy man who tried to kill me?_

_**Yes.** _

_Whaaaat the fuck._

_**Foul-mouthed child.** _

_This is crazy. I’m crazy, aren't I?_

_**No, you're quite sane, I assure you.** _

_...the fuck._

_**Disgusting.** _

_18 - 03 - 20XX_

_Sans won't leave me alone._

_It's annoying me. A lot._

_Like okay I almost died and shit but chill dude I'm fine now._

_I feel okay. Better than okay, actually._

_My chest feels like it's on fire at times but other than that I feel...good. Better than I've felt in a while._

_**That's his magic’s doing.** _

_Oh my god stop??? It freaks me out when I see random-ass writing just...appear on my page with no warning. That's some Tom Riddle’s journal shit right there._

_**I do not know of this Tom Riddle. Is he a human you're acquainted with?** _

_God no that's not someone you want to be acquainted with._

_**So he's an enemy of yours, then?** _

_Of witches and wizards everywhere~_

_**...I do not understand. Are you saying you have magical capabilities?** _

_No I - fuck, trying to explain this to someone who doesn't get it is making my head hurt. Cue my brain’s confusion._

_**I do not understand.** _

_Yeah, well that makes two of us, Lord Voldemort..._

_22 - 03 - 20XX_

_Okay so._

_I had a bad thought. You know the one. That thought. It made me feel empty, hopeless._

_The weird thing is, Sans knew about it._

_One minute I'm by myself, laying on the floor, and the next, he's there hugging me while I cry my heart out._

_Is his magic really so strongly linked with my SOUL?_

_..._

_What, got nothing to say, Voldemort?_

_..._

_Figures._

_Whenever I want answers, you disappear._

_03 - 04 - 20XX_

_Sans is acting weird._

_Every so often my SOUL will give this weird flutter and he keeps apologising for it._

_It never does it while I'm by myself._

_Only with Sans._

_06 - 06 - 20XX_

_Oh shit I forgot to write._

_Oops._

_Well, things are okay, I guess. I'm still in Snowdin, living with Sans and Papyrus. I've taken to chilling in Sans’ room with him while Undyne comes to visit._

_Holy shit does she terrify me, by the way._

_I don't even have to see her; just hearing her is making my skin crawl._

_Her and Papyrus are downstairs in the kitchen. I think they're making something._

_I hope the house doesn't burn down._

_\-------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_Okay so we have a problem._

_Undyne’s staying the night. Which means she’s taking the couch. Which means I'm stuck up here in Sans’ room._

_Which, y'know, isn't weird in itself, but Sans keeps making my SOUL go to flutter central._

_I think it has something to do with nerves._

_Like chill dude it's not like I'm gonna jump your bones._

_Ha._

_Wow I have to tell him that one that's great._

_07 - 06 - 20XX_

_Okay so I've been thinking._

_I had a lot of time to do that last night, considering how little sleep I got._

_Sans kept me up with his fluttering._

_And the worst thing is, my SOUL’s starting to do it, too. It's like it's...reacting to it._

_It's beginning to ache._

_I got woken up by it this morning. This...weird throbbing deep in my chest that made me feel nauseous._

_Or maybe it was the fact that I woke up in Sans arms._

_He's a surprisingly comfortable snuggle buddy._

_Y'know, for a skeleton._

_\---------------------------------------------------------------_

_Wow, I really went off on a tangent there, didn't I?_

_Okay, so. Thought._

_Sans’ magic is holding my SOUL together, right? So, what if his magic is somehow fusing with my SOUL?_

_What if we merge or something? Can that happen? Is that possible?_

_..._

_Silent again, huh?_

_**...It’s much more complex than that. I don't expect a human like you to understand.** _

_Okay. Ow. Harsh, Voldemort._

_08 - 06 - 20XX_

_Well things went to shit fast._

_So Undyne knows who I am now. I had a very terrifying meeting with her that involved me collapsing in front of her._

_But she doesn't want to kill me._

_Well, yeah, she does want to kill me, but it won't do her any good._

_My SOUL’S useless in terms of the barrier._

_It would shatter too quickly._

_Also she said that Sans wouldn't let her kill me?_

_This is making my head hurt._

_Sans and I are bonded. I'm still trying to wrap my head around what that really means._

_We're bonded. Like soulmates. Because he saved me and linked his magic to my SOUL._

_He's being really protective. Like he's standing guard the whole time and I'm pretty sure he growled at Undyne when she got close to me earlier._

_A fucking growling skeleton. Now I've fucking seen everything._

_But hey, at least Papyrus is still treating me the same as he always has._

_We're spending the day together tomorrow. Just us. No Sans. No Undyne. Just me and Papyrus._

_It'll be a nice change of pace._

_..._

_Hey I know you're probably not gonna answer but_

_I'm not looking after your sons for you, Gaster._

_They mean enough to me anyway, without you messing with my head._

_..._

_But you're welcome._


	16. THE ONE WHERE YOU TALK ABOUT FEELINGS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so it's obviously been more than a month since I last updated this. And for that I apologise. 
> 
> Long story short, I currently don't have an actual home to live in. Right now, I'm constantly switching back and forth between my grandparents places, and it's gotten me very low, the lowest I've been since my grandfather died. I wrote this up a while ago, so thankfully I still have something to give you all. However, from this point on, I'm no longer ahead with my writing. 
> 
> I'm sorry for this. I know I promised I would update in a month. But there was no way for me to predict that thing's would go this shit. You don't need to worry. I'm safe. That's the most important thing. 
> 
> I'm just, like the reader, at a fucking low point in their life right now. But it's whatever. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy.
> 
> ~Dawn~

Your eyes narrowed slightly as you placed the sauce covered spoon to your lips, tasting it before nodding to yourself.  
  
"How are the noodles coming along, Pap?"  
  
"THEY'RE LOOKING...EVIDENTLY A LOT LESS ON FIRE THAN THE LAST ONES. THAT’S...A GOOD SIGN, YES? IN TERMS OF HUMAN COOKING?"  
  
"Very good."  
  
"THEN THEY'RE ABSOLUTELY TREMENDOUS!"   
  
You let out a laugh, walking over to where Papyrus was currently stirring the noodles.   
  
"Looking good, master chef Papyrus!"  
  
"WHY THANK YOU, MASTER COOKING ASSISTANT _____!"  
  
You beamed up at him, feeling the way your chest warmed at his happy expression. You could very easily get addicted to the feeling.   
  
Flutter.  
  
The warmth left your chest, and you could feel the frown settle on your face as that familiar feeling lingered in your SOUL. You sighed.  
  
"...Hello, Sans. You're home early."  
  
You glanced around Papyrus, raising an eyebrow as you noticed him in the doorway. He looked...sheepish? Like he'd just been caught with his hand in the metaphorical cookie jar.  
  
"uh...yeah. hey."  
  
Well, this was awkward.  
  
"OH! HELLO, SANS! DON’T GO ANYWHERE; THE SPAGHETTI’S ALMOST DONE! IN FACT, WHY DON’T YOU SET THE TABLE? _____’S BEEN WORKING VERY HARD, SO IT’LL GIVE HER SOME MUCH NEEDED REST! IF YOU HELPED!"  
  
"eh...it’s fine, bro. i already ate. save some for me for later, though, okay? later."  
  
And with that, he was gone.   
  
"...What’s his problem?"  
  
Flutter. Thump.  
  
Oh right. That. That was his problem.

 

  
  
You heaved out a sigh, throwing the spoon you'd been holding into the sink, wincing as it clattered loudly.  
  
"I'll be right back, Papyrus. Keep an eye on the spaghetti, okay? Make sure you don't overcook it."  
  
"OH! DO YOU NEED TO RELIEVE YOUR 'BOWELS' AGAIN? NO WORRIES, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, SHALL SEE TO IT THAT THESE NOODLES ARE COOKED TO PERFECTION!" He paused, eyeing you warily, "BUT...DO TRY AND HURRY BACK, YES?"  
  
"Sure thing."  
  
Inwardly cringing at the bluntness of Papyrus’ words - you really regretted telling him about the whole peeing thing now - you left the kitchen, darting up the stairs and hastily approaching Sans door.  
  
You knocked twice, biting your bottom lip when you didn't receive a response.  
  
"Sans, we need to talk. Let me in," you murmured, pressing your hands against the wood and pushing a little.  
  
You heard a faint sigh, before the lock clicked open.  
  
"it’s open."  
  
His serious tone wasn't one you enjoyed hearing. Ignoring the worried thump your SOUL gave, you pushed open the door, slipping into his room.  
  
He was slumped over the edge of his mattress, his skull in his hands. He glanced up at you with a tired-looking expression on his face, his signature grin absent.  
  
"...You didn't sleep at all last night."  
  
You weren't questioning him. You were stating a fact. He flinched at the reprimanding tone of your voice, before shrugging it off.  
  
"s’no big deal, really. not like i sleep a lot, anyway. i always doze. never sleep."  
  
"Sans, it's not healthy. You need sleep," you sighed, crossing your arms across your chest, "I know it's ironic, coming from me, but you need to take care of yourself."  
  
"s’not my fault that last-...nevermind..."  
  
Flutter.  
  
"...You can't hide stuff from me anymore, y'know? I feel it. All of it." You placed your hand against your chest, motioning to your SOUL.   
  
"And speaking of, we need to talk about that."  
  
"about what?"  
  
"About...this soulmate thing. Everybody's telling me about what it entails, but we need to talk about it. Us. Not anybody else. I'm tired of people putting ideas into my head when I don't have the full story."  
  
There was a moment of silence.  
  
"...it’s gonna be a hell of a talk. you sure you’re up for it?"  
  
"Sans, if I wasn't ready to talk about this, I wouldn't have mentioned it. I just want things sorted."  
  
You looked down at the messy floor, biting at the side of your mouth.  
  
"Every time my SOUL...does something, it puts me on edge. I couldn't sleep last night because of all the stuff going through my head and what it was making me feel...you know my SOUL better than anyone; you’re linked to it...I just...want an explanation. If it can't be fixed, then at least I _know_ it can't be fixed. I'll have closure and be able to die in relative peace."  
  
"don't. don't talk about dying at a time like this."  
  
"I'm just being brutally honest. You wanted me to trust you? Fine. I'm trusting you. I'm trusting you by telling you this. I'm opening up to you. That's what you wanted, right?"  
  
You SOUL gave an angry thump against your rib cage, and you quietened a little.   
  
"...I'm tired of being left in the dark, Sans. I’m tired of people spouting all this...stuff about bonds and soulmates and expecting me to get it. Up on the surface, there _is_ none of that stuff. You meet someone. They might be the one. They might not be. People can get married, and then months later decide it isn't working out and leave each other. There are no ties, except through some...vows and a...stupid piece of paper telling people that you’re legally together."  
  
"...wow."  
  
"Yeah. Yet another reason why the human race sucks, I know."  
  
He chuckled at that, before heaving out a sigh.  
  
"...okay. i’ll talk." He patted the space beside him gently. "come and sit down."  
  
You nodded, before walking over and slumping down beside him. 

 

  
  
"...where do i even start with this...?"  
  
"The beginning is usually a good place to start," you offered with a smile, and he grinned back, nudging you with his shoulder softly.  
  
"right...okay, so i guess, from what you've said, you get the basics of what a soul bond is?"  
  
You nodded.  
  
"Like soulmates, right?"  
  
"yeah. our souls are linked together through...magic and stuff."  
  
"And stuff? What's the stuff part of it?"  
  
"eh, not important. all that matters is we’re linked. our souls are synced with each other on a level that only we can feel...you following so far?"  
  
"So, that's how I can...feel your SOUL...and you can feel mine?"  
  
He nodded, staring up at the ceiling.  
  
"pretty much. only...our bond is fresh, new. we can't feel everything. so far, all i’ve been able to pick up are...strong emotions. and...trust me, you have quite a few. your soul is...really expressive."  
  
You didn't know why, but you suddenly felt like you were naked. As your SOUL gave a flustered thump, the lights in Sans’ eye sockets grew brighter.  
  
"like that one. that one resonated really strong...that's a good one. feels nice...warm."  
  
"You can feel that, too?"  
  
"oh, yeah. i know when you're feeling happy, sad. all of that. your soul’s like an open book."  
  
"That's...not really a comforting thought..."  
  
"eh, relax. it’s something bondmates have to deal with."  
  
You sighed, trying to calm your SOUL’s consistent thrumming.   
  
"So...what can we do about that?"  
  
"nothin’, really. the bond’s only gonna get stronger as time goes on. best just to...try and get used to it, i guess."  
  
You bit your lip, your nails digging into the skin of your arms slightly.  
  
"it’s not like i can read your mind or anything, if that’s any consolation to you. you can still have your secrets, and i can have mine. we don't have to tell each other everything, y’know?"  
  
"...Okay." Better than nothing, you guessed.  
  
"...Sans? This bond...people keep saying it and you're probably thinking it too, but...does it mean what I think it means?"  
  
"depends on what you think it means."  
  
You didn't miss the hitch of his breath.  
  
"Like...mates, right? Partners."  
  
"...yeah."  
  
You inhaled shakily at that. You'd been expecting that, but...it still managed to knock the wind out of you.  
  
"...So where do we go from here? What do we do?"  
  
"...well, we don't have to do anything."  
  
You raised an eyebrow at him, confusion dusting your features.  
  
"we can just...keep going like we have been. if you don’t want to do anything, then that’s fine. we can be bondmates and friends. just without the bondmates part."  
  
"...So, just friends?" Your lips twitched into a grin when he winked at you.  
  
"best pals. the kinda pals that do weird stuff together and everyone thinks they’re dating but they're not." He turned to look at you fully, his eyes bright and his grin wide.  
  
"whaddaya say? wanna be my not gf?"   
  
You laughed, unable to keep the warmth from spreading on your cheeks.   
  
"As long as being your not gf entitles me to free Grillby’s and cuddle privileges, then I'm sold."  
  
"sweet. i also get to call you cute nicknames, too."  
  
"Such as...?"  
  
"eh. i don't know yet. probably something like 'scrub lord'."  
  
"You’re out of control. I want out of this not relationship."  
  
"too bad. you’re stuck with me now, scrub-a-dub."  
  
"_____! THE SPAGHETTI’S ON FIRE THIS IS TERRIBLE! PLEASE FINISH EMPTYING YOUR BOWELS AND COME HELP ME OR I’LL BE FORCED TO USE DRASTIC MEASURES!"  
  
You winced at the clattering that followed, before glancing at Sans.  
  
"I...should probably go and help him before the house burns down."  
  
"sure thing. i’ll be down in a minute." He flashed you a cheeky smile, his eyes practically glittering. "don't miss me too much when you’re down there with my bro, scrubly~"  
  
You rolled your eyes, your own cheeky smile settling on your face when an idea popped into your head.  
  
You couldn't stop the giggle that left your mouth when you pressed your lips to Sans’ forehead, giving him a quick peck against the space above his eye sockets.   
  
"eh b-beh!?" The startled noise that left him made you laugh, and you pulled back, watching as his magic crackled along his cheekbones, turning them a vibrant blue. Your SOUL gave a powerful flutter.  
  
"Eh beh to you too, not bf."   
  
Chuckling, you got up from your seat on his mattress, walking to the door and opening it. You turned back, offering him a sweet smile.   
  
"Also, your nicknames need serious work, Sansafrass. Try to go for endearing rather than insulting."  
  
And with that, you closed the door on his shocked face.


End file.
